Inner Struggles
by Kikamo-chan
Summary: A lonely teenager tries to move on in life after her family mysteriously disappears. Left only with a shread of courage and one clue to finding her family, she sets out to the only place she can find sanctuary but ends up finding so much more.SS&ET CHP 9
1. The beginning of an unforgettable journy

**Inner struggles**

Summary:

A lonely teenager tries to move on in life after her family mysteriously disappears. Left only with a shread of courage and one clue to finding her family. She sets out to the only place she can find sanctuary but ends up finding so much more.

Disclaimer: I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura, Clamp does. sniffsniff

**Chapter 1:**

**The beginning of an unforgettable journey**

The sky glistened with a serene sparkle of knowing as the train trudged along the rickety rails. It was early morning and everyone was asleep, all except a young woman with a heartfelt secret. She sat in an old chair that looked as though it was on the prink of decay, as she gazed out of the window into the small town she would make her home. With nothing but the clothes on her back and a child size traveling bag she wondered if this was how life was really meant to be. As she almost succumbed to her desire to finally lay her eyes to rest the loud speakers boomed from the ceiling.

"We are now approaching our final stop for tonight. Please gather all your things and prepare to disembark. We are approaching Tomoeda. Thank-you and we hope you've had a pleasant voyage."

Struggling to keep herself from finding her well-deserved rest, she hitched her bag on her small shoulder and opened the compartment door. Many people were filing out of their compartments just as she did. Soon the walkway was piled with people. She pushed her way through the crowd just as the train halted. Pushing open the train door she stepped off onto the train station. She watched as people were reunited with family and hugged in tight embraces. A sole tear escaped her once resilient emerald eyes. Wiping the tear from her eye, she knew it was a fools hope to wish for something she had lost so easily. The more people came clammering out of the train, the more her heart began to ache with loneliness.

She crossed the station and reached a courtesy phone located near the ticket booth. Picking up the receiver daring herself to make the call she desperately wanted to make. Her hand began to tremble and soon her whole body shook. Finally making up her mind she placed the receiver against her ear, began to dial a number on the number pad. It began to ring. Suddenly it stopped and her head was filled with a programmed voice.

"Hello. We are sorry to announce this phone is either busy or has been disconnected. Please try again later. Thank-you."

Her only hope of survival wasn't available to her. Hanging up the receiver, she thought hard on what she was going to do. Suddenly it dawned on her and she picked up the receiver again with newfound hope. Determination was plainly spelled across her worn face. Finally someone answered.

"Hello. Operator speaking. How may I help you?" Rung a high-pitched voice from the other end. The distinct sound of chewing gum echoed in the phone. "Hello? Is anyone there?"

"Oh, sorry." The girls voice spoke softly. "Umm, could you tell me the number to Daidoji Tomoyo please?" Once again the irritating sound of the gum chewer rang in her ear.

"I'm sorry Miss but the computer says there hasn't been a Daidoji Tomoyo in this area for a couple years now. Anything else I can do for ya?" The girl's green eyes that once shimmered with a tiny piece of hope now darkened with despair, but she hadn't come all this to give up. She tried again.

"Umm, then could you tell me if there is a Tomoyo anywhere in this area, please?" She heard the clicking of the keyboard on the other end along with the smacking of the gum between her teeth.

"You're in luck Miss. There is a Hiragizawa Tomoyo at 695-4737. Would you like me to patch you through?" That name rang in her ear for a moment. 'Hiragizawa', where had she heard it before? She shook the thought from her head for if she truly was in luck, she had just found Tomoyo.

"Yes please. Thank-you." Her head was soon filled with ringing. "Pick up, please. Pick up." She whispered to herself. The ringing ceased. A deep masculine voice spoke on the other end. It was obvious that she had awoken him from his slumber.

"Hello?"  
"I'm sorry to disturb you, but is Tomoyo there?" There was a grumble from the other end.  
"One sec." She waited for a moment and soon her heart soared out of her chest.  
"Hello?" It was Tomoyo.  
"Hello Tomoyo, it's me." She waited for a high-pitched scream but no such scream came.  
"Who's calling? Who are you?" Her heart sunk lower than it ever was. Tomoyo didn't recognize her voice. She let out a breath she didn't even know she had held in.

"It's me... it's Sakura."

**A/N:** I know I didn't mention this at all in my Bio Update but it was a creative energy burst. I had all my other fanfic stuff at my Dad's and I really needed to write something. So ya... Hope you enjoyed it. Please review cause...

**More reviews = Happy Kikamo-chan = Faster Updates = Funner stories ((-))**

Oh!! And don't forget to read my other stories cause they'll be updated probably by next week if I'm not too busy.

Ja ne!!


	2. Regaining Hope

**Inner Struggles**

Summary:

A lonely teenager tries to move on in life after her family mysteriously disappears. Left only with a shred of courage and one clue to finding her family. She sets out to the only place she can find sanctuary but ends up finding so much more.

Disclaimer: I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura, Clamp does. sniffsniff

**Chapter 2:**

**Regaining Hope**

Silence filled both ends of the phone connection. One waiting for a reaction, the other not believing what they heard.

"Sakura?" Tomoyo asked awestruck.  
"Yes it's me." Tears began to form in Sakura's eyes.  
"But you left... you... you left." Tomoyo tried convincing herself.  
"I know I left Tomoyo. And now I've come back."  
"But why?" She questioned Sakura and herself.  
"I can explain later. Could you come and pick me up? I know it's early but you're the only one I have left."  
"What? What do you mean? The only one you have left? What's happened Sakura?"  
"I promise I'll explain later. Can you pick me up?" Sakura twirled the phone cord around her index finger. She was starting to get nervous. Tomoyo always knew everything that was going on. Was what happened really that secret?  
"Ummm... Sure. Where are you?"  
"I'm at Tomoeda Train Station. Ummm... Tomoyo... can I stay with you?" Sakura could have sworn she heard Tomoyo smile her all-understanding smile.  
"Of course. You know me. I always have a room prepared for my favourite cousin." Sakura smiled.  
"Thank-you Tomoyo."  
"No problem. I'll be there in 10 minutes." After that she hung up, as did Sakura.

Sakura leaned against the wall of the ticket booth. A smile now spread across her face. I felt wonderful to be welcomed back to where she always wished was her home. Now she could really start over and really try her hardest to find her family. Gazing over the horizon she began to see the sun rise. The pink and orange hues of the sunrise mixed with the dark blue of the night sky. The beauty of the sky took her breath away. For once in a long time Sakura finally felt at peace with her self and the world. Closing her eyes she smelt the air and for the first time that morning did she realize the stimulating freshness of the air. She was torn out of her peaceful world by a gentle touch on her tired shoulder. She turned to find the one person she had been waiting for so long. Tomoyo.

Without a warning she flung herself into her arms. The tight embrace meant so much more than just a hug, it meant happiness, stability, caring but most of all peace. No words were shared as Tomoyo drove them to her home. The calming purr of Tomoyo's car was like a lullaby to Sakura. And soon sleep over took her.

* * *

The sun shone into her bedroom as the birds chirped and signaled the beginning of a day. The sun tickled Sakura's nose and she opened her radiant green eyes to a beautiful rose room decorated with cherry blossoms. Sakura smiled. It was just as she remembered it. This was her bedroom as a child when she would come and visit Tomoyo over the summer. When she was little she would look forward to her trips to Tomoeda every year but as she grew older she came less often and soon she only ever heard from Tomoyo from the occasional letters she would send. Recently though, her and Tomoyo had lost contact.

Sakura rolled over and gazed at the alarm clock on her bedside table.

"12:58" it read.

Sakura was astonished by how long she had slept. She got up from her bed and walked over to her closet. Pulling open the doors she found a closet full of clothing. She had almost forgot Tomoyo designs clothes and made sure she always had a closet full of Sakura's size. Sakura giggled, her first giggle in a long, long time. She pulled out a pair of blue jeans and a pink shirt that said 'Cherry Blossom' on the front. She changed and brushed her hair. Finally when she thought of herself presentable, she left her room and journeyed around the house to find Tomoyo. Stopping in the living room she found a man sitting on the sofa reading a newspaper. As though he read her mind he answered her unspoken question.

"If you're looking for Tomoyo she's at school." He folded the paper to reveal his hansom face covered with glasses that framed his resilient blue eyes that matched his hair. "I am correct, aren't I? You were just about to ask where Tomoyo was, were you not?" He stood up to showcase his height. He was easily 6 feet, a comparable height to Sakura who was only 5'4". Sakura nodded. The man outstretched his hand. "My name is Hiragizawa Eriol." Sakura took his hand and shook it.

"I'm Kinomoto Sakura." Eriol took a clothe out of his shirt pocket and cleaned his glasses.

"You're probably hungry. It looks like you haven't eaten in days. I haven't eaten lunch yet so I'll go make something to eat than. If that's all right with you?" Sakura nodded.

"Thank-you." Sakura followed Eriol into the kitchen and sat at the table and watched him prepare lunch. "Ummm... Eriol... would you mind telling me how you know Tomoyo?" She began to play with her fingers. She knew she was being nosy. Eriol just smiled.

"I was just about to ask you the same question. I tell you first, since you asked first." He stirred the soup and began to tell her how he and Tomoyo met. "I was 17 years old, like yourself as I understand, and I moved to Tomoeda because of family affairs. Tomoyo was only 14 at the time. We went to the same school. The first time I saw her I thought she was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. I waited for a year before I asked her out and she accepted. So we dated for one year and then I... a... proposed. She accepted and we were married two months later. So we've been married for about a year now. Of course she still goes to school and I finished my college course in business just last week so that would be why I'm here. Now your turn." While Eriol was explaining his story he had poured the soup into two bowls and had given one to Sakura.

"Oh... right. Well Tomoyo and I are cousins and we've known each other since we were really small. I moved away and Tomoyo stayed here. I used to come here every so often over summer and Tomoyo and I would play for the longest time. As the years went by we slowly grew apart and soon only wrote letters every couple years. I haven't heard from Tomoyo for a couple years but now she's the only one I have left." She paused and took a big breath. "So that's how I know Tomoyo. But I still can't believe Tomoyo got married without me." Sakura pouted but that didn't last long for soon they both burst into laughter. It felt good for Sakura to laugh a full hearty laugh for she hadn't for a long time. She finished her delicious soup courtesy of Eriol and they began to talk.

As it happens Eriol runs a clothing company that makes Tomoyo's designs real. They seemed like the perfect couple. The afternoon flew by so quickly soon it was time for Tomoyo to return home. As predicted the doorbell rang at exactly 4 o'clock. Both Sakura and Eriol went to answer the door. Eriol opened the door to Tomoyo.

"Hi sweetie!!" Tomoyo squealed. Eriol opened his arms for a hug but she ran past him and launched herself onto an unexpecting Sakura. Sakura hugged her back but sent Eriol an innocent look along with a sweat-drop. He just shrugged it off and left into the living room once again mumbling something about 'girls'.

"How long have you been awake?" Tomoyo asked hooking arms with Sakura and following Eriol into the living. She sat them both down on the sofa and looked Sakura in the eyes.

"Um... since about 1 o'clock." Tomoyo looked worried.

"Have you eaten anything?" She asked motherly.

"Oh yes. Eriol made us some soup. He had lunch with me." Sakura smiled.

"Wow! That's great!" She smiled at Sakura but then turned to Eriol and glared. "Eriol why hadn't you already eaten lunch at noon?" He was caught in the act.

"I was waiting for Sakura." He lied, though it was quite obvious because he hid behind his newspaper again. He took a peek over to see if she had reverted her eyes back to Sakura but with no success, she was still glaring. "Okay fine. I forgot all right? Stop glaring at me!" He shouted.

"Sweetie don't yell. Just eat at an appropriate time tomorrow and I won't have to. I want you live long so when I finish school our children can have a healthy father." Eriol blushed.

"Kids? You've planned on having kids?" Eriol squeaked. Tomoyo shook her head and sighed.

"Of course dear. I planned on about 6. Three little mes and three little yous. They'll all be well behaved and smart. They'll all get along too. And imagine all the little clothing I can design for them!" Her eyes glazed over and stars popped out of her eyes. Both Sakura and Eriol sweat-dropped. "Well back to you Sakura." Tomoyo said after about 5 minutes of gazing into nothing-ness.

"What about me?" She asked nervously.  
"Not to sound forward but, why did you come back?" Sakura froze.  
"Be-because I... I needed a place to... to... umm... stay while I search for my family." She coughed.  
"What? Search for your family?" Asked Tomoyo concerned. Eriol too looked at Sakura as well. (Up until now he was still contemplating 6 kids. sigh)  
"Umm... to be honest..." Sakura whispered. "I don't feel comfortable talking about it yet." Tomoyo sat back on the sofa.  
"Well, then we won't push you." Tomoyo was silent for a moment then an idea popped into her head. "Well until you are, you can come to school with me!"

_**"WHAT?!"**_

**A/N:** So what you think? Review and tell me. I was really bored and I wanted to update cause I wanted to. I know such an awesome reason. Well I've updated so now you have to review. Remember:

**More reviews = Happy Kikamo-chan = Faster Updates = Funner stories ((-))**

Ja ne!!


	3. Finding a place

**Inner struggles**

**Summary:**

A lonely teenager tries to move on in life after her family mysteriously disappears. Left only with a shred of courage and one clue to finding her family. She sets out to the only place she can find sanctuary but ends up finding so much more.

Disclaimer: I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura, Clamp does. sniffsniff

**Chapter 3:   
Finding a place.**

The early morning rays glistened through the drapery. Rolling over to shade herself from dawn's light only to be irritated once again by the constant roaring of her alarm clock. Muffling the sound with her pillows she gazed up at the cieling above her four-poster bed. A sudden rapping at her door added to the atrocities. A happy-go-lucky figure bounced into her room and shot on the lights. Blinded by the flash, she recoiled into a ball on her bed.

"Get up sleepy head! It's time for school!!" Exclaimed an overjoyed Tomoyo. Sakura grumbled a reply. "Oh! Come on Sakura! You even get to try on the cute uniform **I** got to design for the school!" That wasn't the best way to convince Sakura. Although she loved Tomoyo to pieces, her hundreds of designs could be unbearable.

Tomoyo pulled from behind her a pleated slate gray skirt and a white button up, three quarter sleeve blouse with pink trim. In her other hand was a matching slate gray with pink trim jacket. Smiling, her eyes pleaded with Sakura to take her offer. Sighing, Sakura got up and took them from Tomoyo and smiled a thank-you.

After she changed she ventured down the stairs. A little wobbly in the shoes Tomoyo had given her, she held tightly to the railing. Reaching the bottom she heard a mad rush from the kitchen. Daring to enter, she went to see what had caused the ruckus. Tomoyo seemed to be on turbo mode preparing their lunches.

"Umm,.... Tomoyo?" Tomoyo stopped instantly. Looking at Sakura her eyes glowed.

"Oh my God! Sakura you look wonderful!" She stared for a moment before reverting to her prior occupation.

"Ahh... Tomoyo? Doesn't school start in 15 minutes?"

"Don't say that! I haven't been late as of yet and I'm not planning to be any time soon!" She hollered as she continued what she was doing. Sakura stared in awe. Tomoyo grabbed the lunches and Sakura and zoomed out the door.

* * *

SWOOSH! The door slid open as Tomoyo and Sakura skidded into the classroom. 

DING! DONG! DING!

"See. I'm never late." She smiled through her huffs for air. Sakura was just astonished at her enthusiasm.

"Mrs. Hiragizawa care to take a seat?" Tomoyo nodded. Ramani-sensei walked over to Sakura, her eagle eyes staring down her bird nose at her. Realizing they were waiting for an introduction she bowed an apology and proceeded to introduce herself.

"Hi, umm... my name is Kinomoto Sakura. I'm Tomoyo's cousin." It felt good to introduce herself with confidence.

"Well Miss Kinomoto please take a seat." Sakura walked down the aisle to sit next to Tomoyo, who sat at the very back of the class. Placing her bag on the floor, she took a seat and realized there as a rectangular box on her desk. It was labeled, "To Sakura". Sakura nudged Tomoyo.

"Hey, is this from you?" She whispered. Tomoyo shook her head.

"Looks like you already have an admirer." She smiled. Sakura rolled her eyes and opened the box.

"Oh my God!" She whispered in shock.

Tomoyo looked over and gasped. Inside the box was a limited edition pink silk blossom chocker. There were only 75 in the world on top of the fact they were designed by Tomoyo's favourite designer. They were really hard to come by. Sakura looked at Tomoyo in puzzlement.

* * *

Walking to the usual lunch table, Tomoyo and Sakura were discussing the mysterious gift. Arriving to the table, Tomoyo stopped. Clearing her throat she got the attention of her group. 

"Hi guys! I'd like you all to meet my favorite cousin, Sakura!" Sakura smiled nervously and waved. They all waved but one boy who was hid behind a sports magazine. "Sakura, this is Rika," She pointed to a girl with short brown hair. "This is Chiharu," She pointed to a girl with red brown hair tied in two ringlety pigtails. "This is her boyfriend, Takashi," She pointed a happy boy with black hair and eyes that seemed to be glued shut. "And finally, Syaoran." She pointed to the guy behind the magazine. Irritated by his ignorance she spoke again. "I said, AND FINALLY SYAORAN!!!" This seemed to jolt him from his world.

"What?... oh.." Seeing Sakura he smiled, making her melt. "Hi." He said in a deep, gruff voice. Sakura bowed, her cheeks pink. He stood up from the table and outstretched his hand.

"Hi, I'm Syaoran." Emerald met amber. His chestnut brown hair shaded his amber eyes. It was obvious he was popular among girls and a born charmer.

"Hi, I'm Sakura." She smiled and took his hand. He looked at her neck. Feeling uncomfortable, she removed her hand from his grasp and placed in on her neck. "What is there something on my neck?" Returning once again to their world, he shook his head.

"Oh, no. Sorry. It's just, didn't you like the chocker?"

"The chocker? How did you know about the chocker?"

"Usually someone knows what they buy." He smiled and looked down at her hands. One held her lunch; the other held her books and a particular rectangular box. He took the box and opened it, and then he took out the chocker. "Here, turn around." She turned around and lifted her long hair from her back. He reached around her neck and fasined the chocker. He turned her around once more. "There. Now you look more beautiful." She looked up into his eyes.

"Why?" They both stood facing each other for some time until,....

"Yo! Sakura, Syaoran! You can continue flirting later but right now... I WANT TO EAT!" Yelled an aggravated Tomoyo. Shook from the moment, they both turned a beautiful shade of pink.

"Umm... right..." Syaoran walked back to the table and sat where he had before. Sakura just stood there, her fingers placed on the silk collar.

* * *

After lunch, they had two classes then school was out for the day. Sakura packed up her things and closed her locker. Looking around for Tomoyo her eyes strayed to a certain amber-eyed sweetie. Swinging her bag over her shoulder she walked up to him. 

"Hey Syaoran." She smiled. He turned to her and smiled back.

"Hey Sakura. What can I do for you?"

"Oh, have you seen Tomoyo?" Syaoran checked his watch on his wrist and sighed.

"Sorry sweetie but you just missed her." Sakura looked puzzled. "She leaves EXACTLY at 3:50pm." Sakura sighed and rested against the lockers.

"Great! My first day and she leaves without me."

"Hey! Cheer up! You got me!" He smiled humorously. "Why don't I walk you home? That way we can talk." Sakura nodded.

Walking along the way, they had completely forgotten about talking. Eachother's company seemed enough. Sakura finally decided to ask a question she was dieing to know the answer to.

"Umm... Hey Syaoran? Can I ask you a question?"

"Uh-hmm." He nodded.

"Why did you buy the chocker?" Syaoran stopped walking. He looked at Sakura then shrugged.

"I don't know. Tomoyo said she was going to bring a cousin of hers today. She said you were living with her since Sunday when you arrived at 1 in the morning. I figured you were having some sort of problem so I decided I'd try to make you feel welcome." His caring surprised Sakura. She smiled a sincere smile.

"Thank-you."

"Your welcome." They continued walking. "Umm,.. Hey. Do you mind if I ask, what happened to your family?" Sakura shook her head.

"I don't know. I seriously don't know anymore. You know what I mean? When you don't have something for so long, you forget what it was like when you did. It used to be as clear as day what happened but.... now...." Tears came to her eyes. "Now.... I can't remember!" She broke down. Falling to the sidewalk, she covered her face with her hands. "I CAN'T REMEMBER!!!" Syaoran knelt beside her and wrapped her in a tight embrace. She snuggled to his chest and cried. "**I CAN'T REMEMBER!!!**" She collapsed into his arms.

"Shh... It's going to be okay!" He hugged her tighter. "I'll protect you! I promise." For some reason he felt like he had to protect this precious blossom, it just felt so right. Soon she calmed down, her breathing when back to normal and they realized how close they were.

"Oh! Sorry!" Syaoran released her. Inside Sakura felt so cold and lonely. She didn't want to stop hugging him, not for one moment. She got up and he wiped the tears from her cheeks. "Are you okay now?"

"Uh-hmm." She nodded. "Thank-you Syaoran." She picked up her bag from the ground. "I'm sorry for doing this to you on the first day." He chuckled.

"It's alright." He started walking. "Come on. Tomoyo probably wants you home." Sakura laughed.

"Yah. She probably already called the cops to come looking for me." She smiled. "Hey Syaoran, thanks for being my friend.

"No prob sweetie." He turned to look at her. He stared in shock. She was gone!

"Sakura?" He stopped walking and looked around. Suddenly, he heard a distant scream coming from the alleyway.

"**_Sakura!!!_**"

**A/N:** Muhahaaha! I can be so evil! I just love cliffhangers! Anyways, please review and tell me if you think I'm making it go too fast with Sakura and Syaoran. Although I do already have a plan for them! Muhahahahaha! Just review and I'll update quicker and you'll see!!!!

Remember:

**More reviews Happy Kikamo-chan Faster Updates Funner stories ((-))**

Ja ne!! 3 Luv y'all!!!


	4. Learning to Trust

**Inner struggles**

**Summary:**

A lonely teenager tries to move on in life after her family mysteriously disappears. Left only with a shred of courage and one clue to finding her family. She sets out to the only place she can find sanctuary but ends up finding so much more.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura, Clamp does. sniffsniff

**Chapter 4:**

**Learning to Trust**

DING! DONG!

Eriol pulled open the door to reveal his beautiful wife. Her hair swinging back and forth as she rocked on the tips of her feet. She smiled an innocent smile.

"Hey sweetie." Eriol smiled back.

"Hey honey!" Tomoyo squeeked as she hopped into her lover's arms. "How was your day?"

"Fine, fine." Suddenly a thought struck Eriol hard. "Umm.... sweetie... where's Sakura?" Tomoyo dropped from his arms. She gasped, her hand covering her mouth.

"Oh. My. God.... I forgot Sakura..."

---------------------------

Sweat dripped down his temple as he leaned against the alleywall. He could have sworn he heard her yell come from this direction. He had only known her for one short day but he felt he owed it to her to keep her safe. If life had been as traumatic for her as she had expressed he would try to shield her from anymore of it. Her vibrant eyes, the scent of her hair, the feel of her touch, the texture of her skin, if anyone dare alter her beauty, he would make them pay...

A noise from behind startled him from his thoughts. A glare upon his face he turned around. The alleyway was desserted.

"Who's there?" His voice was a low growl.

"Uhhh..." Someone moaned from the other side of the trashcan just down the alley.

Stealthily Syaoran glided across the ground. Slowly he reached out his hand and grabbed hold of the can and quickly yanked it away to reveal a bloodied body. Kneeling down, Syaoran removed the hair from the person's face. Shock filled his eyes. He reconized those lips and definitely that chocker. It was Sakura.

From his uniform pocket he pulled out his cellphone. Almost automactically he dialed the number that seemed to be drilled into him.

"Hello Hiragizawa Residence, Eriol speaking."

"Hi, Eriol. I need you right now... it's Sakura." Without hesitation Eriol answered.

"I'll be right there. Where are you?"

"Some alley on Tomoyo's route home."

CLICK. Syaoran shoved it into his pant pocket and took off his jacket. He wrapped it around Sakura and placed her on his lap. He didn't know how long had passed but soon he heard clattered foot steps from down the way. Soon Eriol and Tomoyo were there and Sakura was taken to safety.

-------------------

Sakura opened her eyes to a white white room.

'How did I get here? Where am I?'

Looking down at her arm she saw she had needles poked everywhere. Then it dawned on her. She was in the hospital. She looked to the foot of her bed and saw three sleeping faces lying there. A smile spread across her bandaged face.

Leaning forward, ever so slightly, she stroked the face of that nearest to her. His eyes flinched at her touch. Sitting back against her pillows she rested her eyes and pondered.

'How did I end up her?'

---Flashback---

"Yah. She probably already called the cops to come looking for me." She smiled. "Hey Syaoran, thanks for being my friend."

"No prob sweetie."

Suddenly a pair of hands reached out and grabbed Sakura. Out of shock, she remained silent. The shadow pulled her down the alley into an open area. There stood at least five well built middle aged men. Sakura freed her hands from her captor. Backing up she realized there was no escape. Tears began to well in her eyes.

"**Ahhhhhhhh!!!!**"

Sakura's head flinched as her memories came rushing back into her mind.

The men slowly drew closer. One man licking his lips, another cracking his knuckles. In unison two of them grabbed hold of her arms as the others stood back and looked on with thirst. The man that stood at the back began to approach while removing his leather gloves.

"Well don't we have someone pretty here."

Sakura began to struggle in her bed and tears began to form in her eyes.

His cold calloused hands touch her pure skin.

"We should have lots of fun with this one. Aye boys?"

Sakura began to struggle.

"Oh, a fighter too." Sakura looked up into his eyes. Red as blood. Suddenly it hit her. She reconized those eyes, but from where?

His hand roamed down her neck and onto the necklace. Furthermore it slid until it landed on her bosom. She tensed. These men were going to rape her, she knew it!

Suddenly from behind one of his men dropped. The leader quickly turned around, releasing Sakura for one moment. That was a moment enough for her to free herself from the other men's grips. She would have made it if it weren't for one of them who hit her on the back and sent her hurtling to the ground. She let out a yelp but that didn't stop them. Another man kicked her in the ribs and she cringed once again. The leader pulled her up by her hair. Displeasure plainly written on his face.

"Sweetie. Are you trying to escape? Tsk. Tsk. Don't do that again."

Once again one of his men dropped. He was beginning to get real agitated.

"Come out little one, or are you too scared?"

"Why would I be scared?" She shadowy figure stepped from the shadows, draped in a dark cloak.

"Why don't you take down your hood and reveal yourself?"

"I don't have to. Let the girl go. I have a bone to pick with you. Baka."

The leader wasn't impressed and out of fury he pushed Sakura down and she knocked her head abruptly on the stone floor. The last she heard were running footsteps and an "Let's get out of here!" followed by an "Are you okay? Shoot I have to get out of here. Take care little stranger." Then Sakura felt a little push and rolled into a large tin garbage can. With a final moan, she passed out.

Tears rolled down her cheeks. She opened her eyes and spaced out into her own world. Her eyes glazed over, she thought to herself.

'That was a horrible experience. Why do bad things alway happen to me?' More tears rolled down her already sopping wet cheeks. 'What happened after that? Did those men have there way with me? How long has it been since then? Who found me and when?' Clutching her forehead she cryed into her hands. Her cries must woken one of them up. She felt a warm hand on her shoulder and she flinched at the contact. Jumping back from the hand she looked towards the person in which it belonged to. Concerned amber greeted heart-struck emerald.

"Sakura? Are you alright?" Sakura slowly pulled away and tried to drag herself away from this messy-haired friend. Her hands clutched to her heart she felt more tears roll down her cheeks. "Sakura it's okay. It's me, Syaoran. Do you remember me?" A smile spread across her raw face. How could she forget Syaoran? He could be so silly. She nodded and reached towards him and hugged him around the waist. "It's going to be alright. I'm here for you."

-----------------

It hadn't been long before Tomoyo and Eriol woke up. They were estatic that Sakura was going to be okay, especially Tomoyo. Sakura just had to stay in the hospital for the rest of the week. Syaoran came everyday after school while Eriol came at lunch and Tomoyo came after supper to get the real truth as to whether Eriol really ate lunch and of course to check up on Sakura.

Finally the day came when Sakura could be let out. Everyone came to return her home.

"So how does it feel to be set free from the hospital?" Asked Tomoyo teasingly. Sakura took in a breath of fresh air as she exited the hospital.

"You would never understand." Syaoran looked at her puzzled. Sensing his stare, Sakura answered his unasked question. "I swore to myself when I was 14, after they released me from 6 months, that I would never let anything happen to me that would land me into a hospital again." She smiled. "Obviously that didn't happen."

"Why did they admit you before?" Asked Eriol concerned.

"Well after my family disappeared they decided I was mentally unstable so they wanted to 'help' me and so they admitted me into the psychiatric ward for testing. Finally they let me out and I hadn't been near one since." She retold quite too chipperly. Syaoran became suspicous as the others laughed along with her. "Oh come on Syaoran, cheer up I'm okay now. See?" She smiled. Forcing his worry aside, he smiled back at her.

---------------

Returning to school the following Monday felt a little weird and anerving. She had only been at school once the prior week and already she had run into trouble. Climbing up the school steps, she would hear whispers as she passed.

"Just ignore them." Tomoyo whispered to her. "The one thing that's bad about High School is that any sort of rummer travels fast." She smiled comforting. Sakura nodded.

Reaching her locker, she swivelled her lock and unlocked it. Out poured at least 3 dozen letters. Puzzlement took Sakura as she opened one letter and read it's contents.

_ Dear Sakura,_

_ I heard about your alley trouble. Call me for help.. ::wink::wink::_

_ - Anonymous... 444-8792_

Sakura was shocked. How could anyone be so crude and disgusting. Hoping not all were like that she quickly opened another one.

_ Dear Sakura,_

_ I know you had trouble in an alley a while back but that doesn't mean you can steal all myguyattention.Next time you get 'stolen' don't come back. And I'd appreciate it if you stayed away from Syaoran anddidn't tell anyone about this letter. If you do, I'll find out. I always do.Beware I'm watching you Sakura._

_ - Someone you don't want to mess with._

Sakura shrugged it off. That may be some cranky chick but she's heard worse, and on top of that, telling HER to stay away from Syaoran. Bah. Who did she think she was. Not bothering to read the other letters Sakura chucked the rest and headed to class; with Syaoran.

-------------------

Soon lunch came and Sakura walked over to the regular lunch table and sat next to Tomoyo who was busily chatting to Chiharu about the lastest issue of 'Vogue'. Taking out her lunch she looked behind her to see Syaoran chatting with this black haired girl. Straining her ears she tryed to listen in on their conversation.

"Yah, that's a great idea." Syaoran said.

The girl smiled.

"Why don't you come and meet the gang. There's someone I really want you to meet." The girl shook her head.

"Nahh.. I'd love to but I gotta run. See ya. I'll phone you later." Syaoran nodded and they hugged but it didn't stop there. Parting the girl kissed Syaoran on the cheek.

Turning around Sakura thought to herself. 'Okay, so she kissed him. No big deal right? Syaoran's just a friend of mine and it really isn't any of my business what he does with his personal life. But still... I wonder who she is...' Her thoughts were interrupted by a sudden bonk on the head. "OW!" She looked up and saw Syaoran with a mischievous grin on his face. "What was that for?"

"Nothing you just seemed sorta out of it. So want were you thinking about?"

"Oh. Nothing really. Just sorta spaced out." She started to eat her lunch. "So who was the girl?" She said as she swallowed a bite of her sandwich.

"What girl?" He paused for a moment. "Oh! That girl. That was umm.... Meiling."

"Your girlfriend?" Syaoran nearly snorted his pop out his nose. "What? Am I that far off?"

"Yah. That was my cousin Meiling. She a little older that I and we were engaged at one point. She'd only wish I was her boyfriend." He chuckled.

"Engaged? Isn't that kinda incestual? I mean you're cousins. That's kinda gross."

"I'm in total agreement with you. It actually took me 10 years to convince her to break it off. Our relationship was so tense before but now as you can see we're really close." He leaned his forehead onto Sakura's. "And plus, If she was my girlfriend I wouldn't be able to date the person I really want to." He smiled which made Sakura blush a beautiful shade of pink. She looked into his eyes.

"Really? That's so sweet." She whispered.

"YO!! LOVE-BIRDS!!! LET'S GO!!! CLASS IS ABOUT TO START!!!" Tomoyo hollered at Sakura and Syaoran. Sakura pulled back from Syaoran quickly and picked up her half-eaten lunch. She waved a good-bye to Syaoran followed Tomoyo into the school only to miss a saddened look of longing from Syaoran.

------------------

School proceeded as usual the following couple of months. Soon it came time for Winter break and Sakura and Syaoran's relationship seemed to become more profound. Tomoyo being as keen on hints as she was, picked up on the subtle hints from both that they were interested. Obviously being the two that you would never expect to place a friendship at risk for a chance for something more Tomoyo decided to begin her scheming.

Recently Sakura took a job at a local coffee house as a waitress. So far she was loving it. She seemed to be making enough for herself to live on her own so she decided to pop the question.

I was late one evening and Sakura, Tomoyo and Eriol were eating a delicous meal created by the late night take-out place. Placing down her chop-sticks Sakura decided to ask then.

"Tomoyo, Eriol I have a question I'd like to ask you both." The two looked at each other and then at Sakura.

"Yes? Go on." Said Tomoyo curiously.

"Well you see, I'm making enough money at the coffee place to have a place of my own. It's not that I don't like to live here with you guys, cause I love to, it's just that I feel like I'm slowing down the 'baby-machine' if you know what I mean." Tomoyo and Eriol both blushed crimson. "Cause you did tell me you wanted 6 so if so I'd say get cracking." Sakura smiled, her cheeks a little pink as well. "So? Is it all right?"

Tomoyo thought for a moment then a thought hit her. This was the perfect set up for her plan. A devilish smile graced her face.

"Of course Sakura honey. It's okay. I think you're right." She peered next to her at her darling Eriol. "I think it's time to start up the 'baby-machine' too." She grinned a grin that Eriol knew something mischievous behind. He too began to grin. Sakura nervous, began to intervene.

"Well you know, when I said you need to start the 'baby-machine' I didn't mean exactly this minute." They all thought about that for a minute and then burst out laughing.

Behind all the laughing, Tomoyo was already formulating a plan to get the two people destined to be together just that, together.

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**A/N**: N-YAO!!!!!!!!! Please review!!!!!!!! I hope you like it. It took me a long time to write cause I wanted to make it long to make up for not updating soon. SO REVIEW AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THOUGHT!!!! SO REMEMBER:

**More reviews Happy Kikamo-chan Faster Updates Funner stories ((-))**

Ja ne!! 3 Luv y'all!!!


	5. Opening new doors

**Inner Struggles**

**Summary:**

A lonely teenager tries to move on in life after her family mysteriously disappears. Left only with a shred of courage and one clue to finding her family, she sets out to the only place she can find sanctuary but ends up finding so much more.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura, Clamp does. :sniff:sniff:

**Chapter 5:**

**Opening new doors**

"Hi. Welcome to Tomoeda Coffee. What can I get for you?"

Sakura stood behind the counter and took the person's order. Her job was going great and after her talk with Tomoyo and Eriol she started to look for a new place. Sadly she had yet to draw a conclusion on that subject. The places were either too big, too small, too expensive, too cheap or they already contained a creepy tenant.

"Sakura!" Her boss, Naoko shouted. "You can take a break now!" Sakura nodded. Naoko was a kind lady in her mid-twenties. She had short brown hair and fairly large glasses but Sakura always seemed to think of her as the big sister she never had. Walking from behind the counter, Sakura grabbed the classifieds and sat in her usual booth. There she sat poring over the paper with a large orange highlighter circling the apartments that spoke to her. She had circled about five when someone tapped her on the shoulder. Surprised, she dropped her highlighter and looked towards the person. Who she saw surprised her but made her happy all the same.

"Mind if I sit down?" He asked. She shook her head and offered the seat across from her. "So how have you been Sakura? I haven't seen you in a while." Sakura giggled.

"Syaoran, you saw me the day before yesterday." Syaoran scratched his head then blushed remembering the dinner he attended at Tomoyo's.

"Oh... yah. I forgot about that." He looked down at her paper. "What 'cha using that for?" Sakura looked down at her paper too and sighed. She still hadn't told Syaoran she wanted to move out of Tomoyo and Eriol's.

"I'm looking for an apartment." Syaoran looked puzzled.

"Why are you looking for an apartment?"

"I feel like I'm impeding on Tomoyo and Eriol's relationship." Syaoran nodded with understanding. Then an idea struck him.

"Hey Sakura. Here's an idea." Sakura tore her gaze away from her paper after circling one more option. Her eyes uncertain and a bit confused. "Why don't you stay with me?" Sakura was taken aback. She had never thought of asking Syaoran, not to mention him asking her. Still the idea of living with Syaoran was exhilarating. They were only friends, she knew that, but inside she longed for more. "It's only a suggestion, I mean if you don't want to I underst"

"No. It's not that." Sakura interrupted. "It's just, won't it be kind of weird, us living together?" Syaoran shook his head.

"Nah. I've lived with really weird people before, and plus aren't we friends?" Sakura agreed with him. They were friends. It wouldn't be weird at all it would be a blast.

"Are you sure you want me to move in? I'd love to but wouldn't that impose a lot on you?" Syaoran shook his head, again.

"I want you to live with me. That's why I asked you."

"Then it's settled." Sakura smiled gratefully. "So when can I move in?"

"How about this weekend?"

"Sounds great."

"Sakura! You're breaks up!" Shouted Naoko from the back as the afternoon rush began to pile in.

"'Kay! I'm coming!" She hollered in return. "I'll see you later Syaoran, or should I say 'roomie'?" Syaoran chuckled at her childishness. She would make an awesome roommate and hopefully never find out that Tomoyo told him to ask her to move in with him.

* * *

The weekend came and Sakura was moving her stuff in. Tomoyo and Eriol helped of course. In other words, Sakura and Tomoyo sat and drank some hot chocolate while Syaoran and Eriol busted their backs. For someone who came to Tomoeda with nothing, over the past couple months, Sakura accumulated plenty of junk, aka mostly clothing or cute things Tomoyo decided she would give to Sakura. Soon lunch came and Syaoran and Eriol had finally finished moving in MOST of Sakura's stuff. They all sat at the kitchen table and ate some veggie soup. Sakura stopped eating for a moment and looked around the apartment.

"Syaoran,..." She paused continuing to look around the place. "... are you rich?" Everyone fell off his or her chair. Slowly getting back up on his chair, Syaoran looked at Sakura oddly.

"Why would you think I'm rich?" Sakura shrugged and ate another spoonful of her soup.

"I don't know... you lived here alone for who knows how long... there's no pictures or sign of family. You must get lonely." Syaoran smiled sincerely.

"Yah. It does but that's all going to change." Sakura looked at him confused. "Now I'll have you to spend time with." Sakura smiled back and checked her watch. She abruptly stood up and ran to the door. Syaoran, Tomoyo and Eriol leaned off their chairs to peer down the hall at the jittery brunette. She pulled on her jacket and grabbed her keys and was about to open the door when Syaoran came over to her.

"Umm... Sakura, where are you going?" Sakura looked up at Syaoran, totally bewildered. "Sakura?"

"I have an appointment with the police." She whispered. "They... they have a lead to my family..." She looked down and began to cry. Her hands covered her tear-streaked face; "They wouldn't tell me on the phone... they said they should tell me in person." Syaoran looked sincerely at this crest-fallen beauty. He brought her into a tight hug and comforted her.

"Sakura, would you like me to come with you?" Sakura looked up at Syaoran with great appreciation. She nodded and he wiped her tears her cheeks.

"Thank-you Syaoran." She hugged him, feeling his warmth. "You mean so much to me." Syaoran smiled because the feeling was mutual.

Finally, pulling from the hug, Syaoran pulled on his coat and walked into the kitchen to get his car keys. Walking in he stumbled over the almost forgotten couple peering around the corner. Rolling his eyes, he grabbed his keys and told them to stay put. Being as childish as they were, they obeyed until he would return.

Walking back to the entrance, he grabbed Sakura's hand and they both walked to his forest green convertible. Opening the door, he sat Sakura in the passenger's seat then proceeded to the other side and sat himself in the driver's seat. He put the keys in the ignition and was about to pull out when he saw Sakura's shaking figure. Sincere concern entered his amber eyes, he wanted so much to protect her but somehow she seemed to make it so hard to protect her from anything. Maybe them living together would give him that chance. He reached over and placed his hand over her shivering clasped ones. She looked up to him, obviously nervous about the news; he pulled her towards him in an embrace and whispered sweet comforting words into her ear. She hugged him back and he kissed her on the forehead, like an older brother would have, before pulling out of the driveway and heading towards the police station.

Entering the building she went to the receptionist and announced her presence, like any other bureau she was asked to take a seat and wait for the inspector to finish some business in his office before going in. Her and Syaoran sat in the lobby and waited. Soon an old man with a large grey beard came out and greeted them, he introduced himself as Inspector Meiukasa. Leading them into his office, he shut the door and offered them seats, sitting down himself. Pulling out a folder he opened it and adjusted his spectacles.

"So Ms. Kinomoto we have found some evidence concerning, what we believe to be, the disappearance of your family. Could you please look at these pictures?" He pulled a couple pictures from the folder and placed them on his desk. Sakura looked nervously at Syaoran who gave her a reassuring smile. Inching forward on her chair she peered down at the pictures. A distressed look crossed her face and her eyes began to water. Placing her hands over her trembling chin she cried into her palms. Images of that night began to return to her. Her mother... her father... her older brother... a man with viciously red eyes... and a blood curdling scream. She began to whimper, her hands clamped to her head.

"Sakura? Are you alright?" Syaoran asked concerned. He looked onto the desk at the pictures. He was shocked. One was of a beautiful lady he presumed to be Sakura's mother, they had the same eyes. Next to it was a picture of a mutilated body, totally bloodied and abused. There was also a picture of a smart man with short brown hair and glasses, also with its hideous counterpart. Was this what happened to Sakura's family? Could she have met the same fate? He looked to her, still shaking and muttering things through her tears. He looked to the inspector who almost seemed to not care. How could someone show horrible pictures to an already hurt person? His blood began to boil; he would have exploded if it weren't for that sweet voice in so much pain.

"Syaoran... make it stop... please... Syaoran... make it stop..." As though it was first nature he moved to Sakura. Kneeling in front of her he shook her shoulders.

"Sakura... I'm here... come back to me. Sakura!" She stopped shivering and looked at Syaoran. Her lips trembled as her tears stained her cheeks.

"I... I saw their faces... They were calling for me. And... and I couldn't do ANYTHING! I can't do anything to help them find peace!" She cried on Syaoran's shoulder and he embraced her tightly.

"Actually, there is something you can do to help them." Said Meiukasa. Both Sakura and Syaoran looked at him sceptically. "I have this picture of a suspect. If you can identify him as your family's attacker we can prosecute him. Your parents will receive justice." Sakura looked as though she didn't have any more strength, though she nodded. Before she looked at the picture a thought struck her.

"My... my brother. What happened to Touya?" The inspector's face darkened.

"We haven't found any evidence that he's dead or alive. Whatever's happened to him, whatever it was, it was done cleanly. Very cleanly." Sakura's face grew serious. She looked down at the picture. She gasped and turned back into Syaoran's arms.

"That's him. Those eyes. There's no mistaking those eyes."

"You would testify that in court if needed?"

"Yes. I'm positive that's him."

The inspector stood up and gathered the photos.

"Thank-you for your time Ms Kinomoto. We'll contact you if there's anymore news regarding this matter." Sakura gathered her things and left with Syaoran.

Plopping in Syaoran's convertible she sighed a deep sigh. Syaoran looked at her then started the car. When they got home it was 4:30 but Sakura muttered something about being tired and headed to her new room and went to bed. When Syaoran came inside he noticed Tomoyo and Eriol sitting at the kitchen table. It had been a long day but he felt he owed it to them for waiting. He sat down at the table as Tomoyo poured him some tea and retold the day's events.

* * *

It must have been three in the morning but Sakura wasn't tired anymore or at least couldn't sleep knowing every time she closed her eyes she'd see _his_ face. Sighing she got up from bed and headed to the living room where she sat down on the couch. Peering around she noticed one common theme: everything was green apart from the things she brought. Resting her head against the back of the sofa she closed her eyes for what she thought was a minute. When she opened them she noticed the delicious smell of pancakes. Then she noticed the warm blanket wrapped around her. Rubbing the sleep from her eyes she turned to the kitchen to find Syaoran making breakfast.

"Good morning." She whispered. Syaoran looked over at her.

"So the sleeping beauty is finally awake." He chided. Sakura glared at him but smiled at his joking.

"What time is it?"

"11 o'clock. Sunday." Sakura curled back into a ball in the blankets on the couch.

"Good, then I don't have work."

"How was your night? You went to bed early yesterday."

"Okay... I woke up at 3 and came out here. I don't like just lying and doing nothing. When's breakfast?"

"Right now if you come and sit at the table." Sakura climbed from the couch and sat at the table in her pjs. It felt kind of awkward at first and Sakura almost went to go change but decided against it. It wasn't like she was naked; she had a tank top and a pair of matching pants courtesy of Tomoyo. They sat and ate in silence, until Syaoran decided to start a conversation.

"So what do you want to do today?" Sakura shrugged.

"I don't know, you?"

"I'm not too sure either. Maybe start getting ready for school. It starts again in a week you know." Sakura sighed.

"School... I hate school. Its boring and well... I just hate it." Syaoran chuckled. "What?"

"You could do with more vocabulary." Sakura glared.

"Fine. I need school stuff anyways. You're driving." She picked up her plate and put it in the soapy sink. "But first I'm taking a shower." She walked down the hall, and then reappeared. "Oh. Thanks for breakfast Syaoran." She smiled and left for the bathroom. Syaoran smiled back and shook his head.

About 30 minutes later Sakura had reappeared and they left. It was a beautiful day. The sun was shining and the birds were chirping. Arriving at the supply store Sakura jumped out of the car and skipped to the doors.

"It's such a beautiful day. I don't think it's been this sunny before!" Her face gleamed as bright as the sun.

"Sure sweet-cheeks. Do you even have money for this trip?" Her face darkened. "You forgot you had to buy the stuff right?" She nodded. He rubbed the back of his neck. "I suppose I could buy it..." Sakura jumped on him.

"SYAORAN! YOU'RE MY HERO!"

"OKAY! GET OFF ME!" Sakura frowned and crossed her arms.

"Somebody's grumpy."

"I'M NOT GRUMPY! I just don't like people spontaneously touching me!"

"You mean like this?" Sakura poked him in the arm.

"STOP IT!"

"Like this?" She poked him on the forehead.

"ARGH!"

"Sorry Syaoran. You must mean this." She stood on her toes and kissed him on the cheek. Syaoran stopped. Syaoran giggled and ran into the store. Syaoran sighed inwardly.

'I thought I was the smooth one.'

Entering the store Syaoran scanned the area for a sign of Sakura. He finally found her looking at different pens. She looked at him and smiled.

"What else do you need?" Syaoran asked seeing her basket full of stuff. She looked at her list.

"Some notebooks and... no more pens." She said as she chucked a packet of pens into the basket.

"I'll go get some."

"Wait. What about your stuff?"

"All I needed were notebooks anyways. I'll be right back." He said as he headed towards the notebook aisle. Walking over he heard an old couple talking.

"See? Look at them. Why can't you be like that?" Said the woman.

"Easy. They haven't been married for 20 years." Replied the man.

"What's that mean?"

"I mean that after they get married courtesy goes down the drain."

"That's not true, I still get you breakfast in the morning."

"Yes but it's always cold." The man complained.

"Well if you did something yourself for a change..."

Syaoran laughed and returned to a confused Sakura.

"Why are you laughing?" Syaoran turned Sakura around and put the notebooks in her basket.

"You see that old couple arguing?" Sakura nodded. "They're fighting because they think we're a couple." He laughed to himself. "They've been following us." Sakura thought for a moment then got an idea.

"Let's see how far they'll follow." Sakura grabbed Syaoran's hand and pulled him down a few aisles then over a few more. Just as Sakura expected, they followed 'inconspicuously'. Sakura backed up into an aisle and pulled Syaoran close to her in a hug.

"Just pretend." She whispered into his ear. Grinning he got her idea. He pulled her closer and pretended to kiss her neck. She did her part too, every so often she would moan from pleasure and look at the couple. Their disgusted faces were priceless. She put her hand on the back of Syaoran's head and shut her eyes. The old couple were revolted and left. Sakura began to laugh and Syaoran took it as a sign that the show was over. He pulled back and laughed too.

"What did they look like?"

"Purely disgusted." They continued to laugh. "Hey Syaoran, you're pretty good at pretending." He smiled devilishly.

"I've had my share of practice." Sakura gasped and playfully hit him on the arm. "You're good too." She smiled.

"I've had practice too." They laughed.

They walked to the till and saw the old couple looking at another young 'couple'. Sakura heard the old woman say, "teenagers, no restraint. In my day..." Sakura laughed and the couple looked their way so she smiled and waved at them. They looked totally disgusted when Sakura grabbed Syaoran's hand and hugged his arm. He looked surprised but Sakura whispered in his ear that the old couple was watching. He grinned and unclasped their hands and snaked it around her waist. They paid and left. When they got into the car they started to laugh again.

Returning home they put the stuff on the table and watched a movie. Halfway through the movie Sakura was hungry so she made enough pasta for two so her and Syaoran finished the movie with some delicious pasta. It was late so after the second movie, Sakura and Syaoran decided it was time to turn in.

Sakura had finally settled down and was falling asleep when she heard a voice in her head.

_"Take them over there... tie them up. Where's the kid?... Hey look! There she goes! Get her! A fighter aye?... well you won't be for long..."_

Sakura's eyes snapped open. Her forehead was all sweaty. She got up and washed her face in the bathroom.

'Why am I hearing things?'

She went back to bed but couldn't sleep.

'I wonder if Syaoran's up?' She decided to go check. She got up again and walked to Syaoran's room. His door was shut, she slowly creaked it open. He stirred.

"Syaoran? Are you awake?" She whispered.

"What?" He groaned. "It's 1 o'clock in the morning."

"I can't sleep." She stated sheepishly. Catching her unasked question, he pulled back the covers on the other side of the bed.

"Fine. Just go to bed." He said as he rolled over. Sakura slid under the warm sheets and curled up on the edge of the bed. Sleep taking a hold, she rolled over...

...Into Syaoran's arms.

* * *

The morning had come and then the mornings after that. Sakura's head kept playing tricks on her and it seemed as though every night she made her way to Syaoran's room.

Eventually it was time to go back to school. Syaoran's alarm went off.

'7:00 am'

He rolled over and looked at Sakura's sleeping face. She looked like a sleeping angel in his eyes, his angel. He reached to her face and touched her cheek softly. Her eyes flinched but a smile came to her face and she snuggled her face into his palm. Syaoran smiled and got up and dressed.

Around 7:30 he heard a screech immerge from his room. He chuckled and continued to make breakfast. Soon he heard the clattering of the shampoo as Sakura ran into the bathroom. Five minutes later Sakura ran from there to her bedroom and came out ten minutes later dressed and ready to go. Just as Syaoran placed two plated on the table, Sakura sat down.

"Good morning." Sakura glared. "What?"

"You could have woken me up earlier you know."

"Why? And miss you panic? No way! Plus you were sleeping so soundly I thought I'd let you sleep a little longer."

"News flash Syaoran! I'm a girl! I can't just get out of bed and throw on clothes and leave!"

"Are you calling me a girl?"

"That's what you do!"

"Excuse me but I have to gel hair! Like it never stays the way I want! I like to preserve that 'just got up from a rowdy night' look! COME ON!" Syaoran expresses rather prissily.

"Are you mocking me?"

"Of course not. Now let's go or we'll be late." He said as he grabbed his bag and keys and waited at the door for Sakura as she went to get her stuff.

They mostly remained silent when they were in the car. When Syaoran parked and got out, as did Sakura but unfortunately Tomoyo attacked her with a hug.

"Sakura! I haven't seen you in forever! What have you been doing that's kept you away? You didn't do anything rash did you? And not with Syaoran? Did you! Did you!" Tomoyo hollered hurriedly. Both Sakura and Syaoran sweat dropped. They suddenly liked it as just the two of them, it was a lot quieter. "I mean Syaoran's the only one I would trust you with. I hear he's a delicate lover... would you know?"

"TOMOYO!" Syaoran hollered face red. Sakura remained silently clueless as Tomoyo dragged her away.

"Later Syaoran!" Tomoyo hollered back. Syaoran sighed as he shoved his keys into his pocket.

"Girlfriends, huh? Can't live with them, can't live without 'em." Syaoran turned around to come face to face with the new guy.

"She's not my girlfriend." Syaoran stated.

"Oh! Then she's on the market?" The guy asked.

"Sakura's not a thing. Who are you anyways?" Syaoran scowled. The guy, as though surprised that Syaoran didn't know him, answered willingly.

"Di Camron, my dad was just elected in this district." He out-stretched his hand for Syaoran to shake. Syaoran took it but decided to keep Sakura away from this creep; he just had a vibe, a bad vibe.

"Li Syaoran, Li Clan, China." He frowned. "Stay away from Sakura." He said as he walked away.

"But she's single, unless she's someone else's" He said dumbly.

"She may be single, but she doesn't need anyone. I'm her friend, that's all she needs." He turned and walked into the school.

Camron's smile faded from his face. Nobody tells him what he can and cannot have.

* * *

Class was about to start and Sakura was seated next to Tomoyo when she saw Syaoran at the door. She was about to leave the door when the teacher stopped her.

"Where are you going Miss Kinomoto?"

"Excuse her sensei. I need to have a word with her for a moment." Syaoran said.

"Of course Mr Li, please be quick. Our class is already cut short." Both Sakura and Syaoran nodded.

"What did you need to talk to me about?" Sakura asked confused.

"I just wanted to warn you. There's a new guy and he's got bad intentions towards you." He said, a glare fixed to his face. Sakura smiled.

"There's many new guys Syaoran, but I'll be careful. Okay?" Syaoran grunted.

"You better." He kissed her on the forehead. "I don't want you to get hurt anymore than you have to. You're important to me." He smiled sincerely. Sakura blushed a bit.

"Same to you." She smiled back.

"Go to class sweet-cheeks and BE CAREFUL!" He grinned. Sakura nodded as Syaoran left. He was such a gentleman. She smiled and was about to open the door when a girl came screeching to a stop in front of the door, nearly pushing Sakura over.

"Sorry!"

"It's okay. Are you new here?"

"Yes and I'm late. I'm Di Cara. Nice to meet you." She was quite pretty with her long blond hair and blue eyes.

"Hi, I'm Kinomoto Sakura. Nice to meet you too." She smiled.

"I'm sorry but I was sort of spying... who was that guy you were talking to? He was hot!" Sakura's smile faded. This girl just got here and already she was after Syaoran.

"Li Syaoran."

* * *

**A/N:** WHOO! Sorry for the late update. But hey! A late update is better than no update at all right?

So the plot thickens... dun dun duuuuun..

Oh and for all those sickies, when Sakura slept in Syaoran's bed that's all she did... nothing else happened... (not just yet anyways...lol ;p)

So yah...

What part do Di Camron and Cara play in Sakura and Syaoran's relationship?

When will the puzzle that is Sakura's family be solved?

What ever did happen to 'dearest' Touya?

**Tune in next time for the next chapter of...**

**INNER STRUGGLES!  
****(No release date scheduled, sry ;)**

Remember:

**More reviews - Happy Kikamo-chan - more inspiration - faster updates - funner stories ((-))**

Ja ne,

Kikamo-chan ((-))

4046 words


	6. Closing a window

**Inner Struggles**

**Summary:**

A lonely teenager tries to move on in life after her family mysteriously disappears. Left only with a shread of courage and one clue to finding her family, she sets out to the only place she can find sanctuary but ends up finding so much more.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura, Clamp does. :sniff:sniff:

**Chapter 6:**

**Closing a window**

The first blocks of the day slowly progressed. Finally the bell rang and it was lunch. Stretching as she walked, Sakura headed towards the picnic tables where they usually sat. Sitting down with a thud she plopped her lunch on the table and yawned.

"Been having a long day Sakura?" Asked Chiharu looking over her magasine with a sandwich in her hand.  
"I guess so." She yawned again rubbing the sleep from her eyes. "Break has made me really lazy I guess and Geography wasn't helping either." She slumped over and nestled her face into her crossed arms. Closing her eyes she was on the edge of sleep when the voice crept into her head again.

_'Wake up! Get over there! NOW!' _

Her eyes shot open and she let out a gasp. She looked around to find everyone looking at her. She wiped the sweat off her forehead and rested it in her palms. A hand touched her shoulder gently and a smile spread across her face.

"Hey Sy--" She looked up to see Tomoyo looking at her worriedly. "Tomoyo!" She covered quickly. Tomoyo sat down next to her and pulled out her lunch.

"Aren't you going to eat Sakura?" She shook her head.

"Nah. I'm not hungry." Tomoyo looked skeptical.  
"Have you seen Syaoran today? He seemed rather annoyed when I saw him in the hallway." Sakura chuckled and shook her head and began to eat her lunch.  
"Syaoran is so funny. He's like an older brother to me... actually I take that back. If he was my brother the way he treats me would be nasty." She smiled.

"I thought you weren't hungry?"  
"I am allowed to change my mind you know and no I haven't seen him since this morning." Suddenly an innocent giggle sounded from behind Sakura followed by a low chuckle.

Sakura immediately recognized that laugh, she had heard it so often and felt possessive about it. It had always comforted her when she needed it most. She memorised the way his face burst with joy and she felt her heart pound harder just thinking about it, it belonged to Syaoran.

Sakura turned around quickly expecting his usual greeting of _'Hey Sweet-cheeks!' _but instead she found him walking towards another table with another girl, a distinct blond with blue eyes, Di Cara. The smile dimmed off her face and her eyes seemed betrayed. How could he just abandon her like that? Weren't they best friends? Didn't that count for anything?

Distraught she grabbed her lunch and walked off to the school. Tears threatening to spill over she ran inside only to hear a faint cry from Tomoyo. Pulling open the door she marched inside and not looking up walked right into someone. She looked up to see a hansom young man with dirty blond hair and electric blue eyes.

"Oh. Sorry." Sakura whispered as she wisked off down the hallway.

"Hey! Are you alright?" The boy shouted and ran after her. Finally catching up to her he turned her around. "Hey, are you alright?" He gazed into her misty emerald eyes. Her cheeks was a rosy pink and her eyes were glossing over. "Hello?"

"Sorry. I...um... I'd like to be alone right now." She breathed.

"Of course and I'll accompany you." He smiled and followed her down the hall.  
"I thank you for your concern but that's alright." She stopped and turned to face him when he threw his arms around her. "WOAH! Excuse me! What are you doing!" She yelled from surprise.  
"I'm hugging you. You looked like you needed a hug. So, I'm hugging you." He spoke huskily into her ear which made her blush. She released a breath she didn't know she held and whispered a thank-you. After a minute she calmed down and he let her go with a sincere smile on her face.  
"I guess right now would be the best time for introductions but first would you like to go outside a sit down?"

Sakura hesitated a bit. Outside would be nice but outside was Syaoran and that Cara girl. Did she really want to see him flirting with someone else? But wait, why would she care? They're just friends, right? Nodding her head she accepted and he took her hand and brought her outside. Once outside they sat under a cherry blossom tree. The breeze blew just hard enough for the petals to be carried away in it. Sakura breathed in the fresh air and then turned to the boy.

"Well, I'm Kinomoto Sakura." She outstretched her hand and he took it and shook it. With her hand in his grasp she felt a little uneasy but she ignored it, it was just butterflies.  
"I know that, I was talking to Syaoran this morning. I'm Di Camron." He responded. He took in a big breath and sighed. " Okay, I know this'll sound a little forward but, I think you are really beautiful, (This made Sakura blush.) and I was wondering if you'd like to go out with me?" Sakura was taken aback. She had never expected that. She was uncertain. Was this the guy that Syaoran was talking about this morning? The one with bad intentions?

She looked over Camron's shoulder at the table where Syaoran and Cara were talking and laughing together. His actions clearly demonstrated that he saw her only as a friend. He seemed to be having a good time without her, maybe she could enjoy herself without him. She looked back at Camron's hopeful face and smiled then nodded. He took her hand and kissed it, a smile spread across his face and his eyes glowed. Just then, as if on queue, the bell rang signalling time to return to class. Camron helped Sakura up as he smiled joyously and walked her to her locker. Sakura just smiled as he took her books and stopping at her class handed them back to her.

"Would you like to go to a movie tonight? If you're not busy that is." Camron asked. Sakura nodded then handed him a piece of paper.

"Here's my number, I'll be home around 4 o'clock so you can phone anytime after then." She smiled. "Well I guess I'll see you tonight then, bye." She turned and walked into the classroom. She heard him call a _'See ya'_ as she sat down at her desk next to Tomoyo. Tomoyo was already sitting down and skimming through her text book when she looked up to see a somewhat gleeful Sakura.

"What made your day?" Sakura didn't answer. "Are you okay from before? You looked really sad." Sakura turned to Tomoyo and nodded. "Who was that guy? That blondy you were so friendly with?" Sakura giggled.  
"You'd never guess Tomoyo but guess what I'm doing tonight." She smiled brightly.

"Planning to make love to your one true love." Tomoyo replied sarcastically. Sakura glared.

"Ha. Ha. And who might that be?"  
"Syaoran of course!" Sakura rolled her eyes as Tomoyo gazed off into her imagination.

"Har, har Tomoyo. Even if I did like him, he'd never notice me. He was too preoccupied with someone else. But that's not the point! I have a date tonight!" Tomoyo let out a high squeeky shreek which drew the attention of the whole class. Sakura shook her head. Why did Tomoyo always have to be so loud? After the moment had passed Sakura continued.

"He asked me out after I was really distraught. It was so sweet I couldn't say no. Plus he seems like a really nice guy."

"What's his name?" Tomoyo inquired once she had regained focus.

"Di Camron." Tomoyo swooned. "Hey, aren't you married?"

"Yes and happily but can't blame me for imagining you and him as a couple. You're just so _'KAWAII'_!" Sakura sighed. "What you don't feel the magic yet?"

"I don't know." She sighed again. "It's just something Syaoran told me this morning, he said some new guy had bad intentions towards me. And I just can't help thinking that this guy is new because I've never seen him before." She rested her head on the arms. "What if he's right?"

"Well you'll never know until you try it Sakura. Plus if it's really that uncomfortable I'm sure your bodyguard will protect you." Tomoyo kidded. Just then a sweet voice entered the conversation.

"You have a bodyguard? Why?" Both Sakura and Tomoyo turned to look at the blond.

"Oh. Hi Cara." Sakura mumbled.

"Oh no! Sakura doesn't have a bodyguard. It's just one of the many names we call Syaoran." Tomoyo smiled.

"I see. But still why would Syaoran have to protect you?" She asked nosily as she sat down behind them intent on hearing the conversation.

"It's nothing. Sakura just is going on a date with a guy tonight and she doesn't know how it'll go." Tomoyo smiled but Sakura glared inwardly at this dumb blond that seemed to like to steal her best friends.

"Do you mind if I ask his name, Sakura? I might be new but I have an older brother and he might be able to help you out if I asked him." Sakura was surprised. By appearance she would have guessed that Cara was an only child that got whatever she wanted. This time Tomoyo didn't answer, they both stared at Sakura waiting for her answer. She sighed.

"His name is Di Camron." Cara's face lit up.

"WOW! Imagine the chances! You're going out with my brother!" Sakura was shocked too. At first glance she would have never guessed that they were related not to mention siblings. But when Sakura looked at her closer they did have the same innocent blue eyes. "Don't worry he was raised mostly by our mother. He knows how to respect women. If he ever makes you feel uncomfortable let me know and I'll have a talk with him." She smiled and Sakura returned the favour. Maybe she wasn't that bad after all. Maybe most of her friends were guys and that's all she saw Syaoran as, or maybe not...

"I don't know, I really like Syaoran. I spent all lunch with him and still he didn't ask me out. I wish he'd take a hint." Cara sighed, Sakura must have zoned out in the middle of the conversation and she didn't like it much now that it revolved around Syaoran. She grimaced. "Sakura what should I do?" Just great, she was giving advice on how to get Syaoran to ask out her arch-nemesis. Wait. She was going out on a date tonight, she had no reason to be angry with her.

"Um... just be yourself. I'd like to think I know Syaoran the best out of everyone but personally I've only ever seen him single, never really interested in anyone. You might want to ask Tomoyo." Cara looked at her blankly.

"Where have you been Sakura? I asked Tomoyo first, but she said you knew him best. I think you spaced out for a second there." Sakura looked at her, where did that attitude come from? "Well it doesn't matter, I'm pretty good at getting what I want." She smiled. Guess some first impressions were right.  
"Actually to tell you the truth, I have seen him interested lately. He usually acts really protective but nice at the same time. It's really sweet. But sadly he can be too dumb sometimes to see it." Tomoyo sighed.

"Hey." An idea just accured to Sakura. "Where's the teacher? It's already 20 minutes since class was supposed to have started?" She wanted to get off that topic because something told her that if Cara found out who Syaoran 'liked' she would become awful to who ever that poor soul was. Even if she disliked Cara for liking Syaoran she would never wish harm on anyone because of it.

* * *

The school day finished just as dully as it began and Sakura stood outside the school waiting for Syaoran when out popped Camron. He was just about to leave when he spotted Sakura waiting by the doors. He walked over to her for some chat and to confirm on their date that night. Before long Cara came over to drag him home. Giving Sakura a hug he left leaving Sakura alone but she wasn't as alone as she thought because Syaoran had seen the whole thing. A glare plastered on his face he walked out to her deciding to ignore it and hoping it was just a sign of friendship for that is all he would allow. 

As they walked to the car they both remained silent. They got in and buckled up and a few minutes in Sakura decided to lighten the mood.

"So Syaoran, how was your first day back?" She asked as she looked over at him, a glare still planted on his face.

"Fine." He said shortly not looking from the road.

"What's up with you? Why are you acting like this?"

"Why were you talking to that Di?" His vision still firmly placed on the road.

"Why do you ask? So what if I was talking with him? It's no big deal." She said waving his concern aside as they pulled into the parking stall.

"Didn't I tell you to stay away from the new guys? Or was I not clear on that?" He looked at her finally, his eyes raging.

"Why are you acting like this? You didn't seem to care at lunch. Or oops. _YOU _were too busy with Miss Blondie to notice!" She sat her arms crossed and her bottom lip out.

"What difference does it make if I was talking to Cara or not? I specifically told you not to go near any of the new guys! Doesn't my word mean anything anymore?" He yelled banging his fist on the steering wheel. Sakura looked over at him, his eyes flickered between his fury and what Sakura thought looked like betrayal. Her eyes became misty but quickly shook it off.

"Let's go inside Syaoran, you're making a scene." And she was right. All their neighbours were either looking through their windows or staring from their balconies. She sighed and got out of the car. She was walking up the stairs when Syaoran yelled back at her.

"GOD DAMMIT SAKURA! WHY DON'T YOU EVER LISTEN TO ME! I DO IT BECAUSE I CARE! YOU'RE THE BEST FRIEND I'VE EVER HAD!" Sakura stopped and went back down the stairs to the car and open the car door for Syaoran.

"I know." She whispered. She knelt down beside him and placed her hands on his. She looked up into his eyes with her misty ones. "But seeing you like this hurts, almost as much as being deserted by you for someone else, especially another girl." Her voice was just loud enough for him to barely hear, for she knew if she spoke any louder her heart would burst. "You've been there for me since I moved here, treated me as part of yourself. We've had fun, we've been sad but we've always done it together. But," she whispered even softer, "some things have to be done alone. And I think this is one of them." She took his face and brought his forehead towards her lips and gently brushed them together. She looked deep into his torn eyes and began to whisper once more. "I love you, you're my best friend and nobody could ever replace you. But, but when you try to control me, I feel as though I'm back to where I was 5 years ago. Captured, being treated worthlessly and it hurts me. As your friend I'll talk about anything with you and ask you for advice or even protection but as my friend I expect the same from you. Honesty, respect those make this work." She began to smile. He looked deep into her eyes. As distraught as she was, he thought she never looked more beautiful. As a single tear rolled down her cheek he took his hand and wiped it away.

"We can talk more inside." He said as he gazed into her eyes. A tiny smile curled the corners of his lips. He eyes became happy and free, all the feelings of resentment that he felt earlier were gone. "Sakura, thank-you. You really are my best friend. And I love you too." He drew closer to her face, and closer to her pink lips. Her delicate lips that he doubted had ever experienced the sensation he so badly wanted to share with her. Their noses were almost touching when Sakura's eyes widened in surprise and she pulled back.

With a hand over her mouth and her eyes in a confused state she stood up and back away. More tears streamed down her cheeks as she turned and ran away finally letting her emotions flow. Syaoran quickly stood up and ran his fingers through his chestnut hair. With a sigh he looked up and saw her fumbling with her keys and the lock to the apartment. Why had he done that? Why had he let his hormones get the best of him? They were only friends, it was clear that's what she thought. After pondering for another ten minutes, he finally decided to go and explain his actions to Sakura. Just as he had opened the door and stepped inside did he notice that Sakura had her coat on and her keys in her hand. He looked puzzled. Sakura looked up at Syaoran but then after their eyes locked she tore her vision away. Biting her bottom lip she dared to walk right passed him. Just as she was almost free from the tension Syaoran pulled her around to face him. Her eyes were full of fear and he suddenly realised she was afraid of him and of what he might do.

"Syaoran please let go. You're hurting me." She whined as his grip seemed to tighten. His eyes opened in shock and quickly released her. He stepped back giving her room to leave but she just stood there. She looked down at her hands as her eyes became misty. "I'm going out with Camron now, I'm sorry I can't return your feelings." She looked up, her eyes and heart visibly torn. "I don't think I can stay here tonight, not with you angry like this. I've already phoned Tomoyo and she said I could stay there the night. It's not permenant, I'm not deserting you. I will come back just wait. Just wait for things to cool down. I love you, I love you so much, but I can't love you that way. Not now. I trust you but, I can't trust myself to trust you. If that makes any sense. I'll see you tommorow at school. I promise." She said and left.

Syaoran just stood there staring at the place where she once stood. He must have stood there for a while because his feet began to ache. Letting out a deep sigh he went and sat on the couch next to the phone. After some minutes of thinking he reached over and dailled.

"Hello Yamazaki Residence. Takashi here." Spoke a chipper voice.

"Hey Takashi. It's Syaoran. I need to talk."

* * *

The movie was good but Sakura's mind kept wandering to Syaoran. Camron wanted to go out for some coffee after but Sakura already had had a long day. He dropped her off at Tomoyo's and she walked up to her cousins house. Ringing the doorbell she waited for a split second before Tomoyo threw the door open. 

"Sakura! Are you okay! What happened with you and Syaoran?" She asked as she ushered her inside. Sakura went over to the living room and sat on a couch with her forehead on her clasped hands.

"Sakura? Did you two fight? Did he hit you?" Tomoyo sat down beside the weeping girl. Sakura shook her head.

"No. It was worse. He-he t-told me he-he l-loves m-me." She sobbed into her hands. Tomoyo stroked her quivering head and tried to calm her down. "And he-he tried to k-kiss m-me." She looked up at Tomoyo, her eyes raining tears. "And the bad thing is that I wanted to, I wanted to kiss him so bad! But I couldn't do that to Camron. I know we just met but it's the least I could do. I'm not that kind of person." She said wiping her tears. Tomoyo pulled her into a hug.

"I think I understand the way you feel. But dating Camron won't solve anything. If only, it'll make it worse. You're leading him and yourself on by dating him. You're continuing something that doesn't have your heart in it. That's never right no matter the circomstance. I'll be here for you but for now I think you should rest. Go upstairs and get some sleep. You'll feel better in the morning. Trust me." Tomoyo explained motherly. Sakura smiled.

"Thank-you Tomoyo. I feel better already. I think I'll be able to talk to Syaoran about this calmly and rashionly tommorow."

With that she went upstair to her room to pass the day on to the next. Lying in her bed she couldn't sleep. Everytime she closed her eyes she either saw memories of the past or images of Syaoran leaving her for good. She felt cold and lonely. Little did she know he felt the same.

* * *

The morning came too quickly for Sakura's liking. She was dreading the conversation she would have to have with Syaoran that day. She was feeling torn between... well she wasn't quite sure what. She rolled over and looked at her alarm clock. 

'6:30 am'

Rolling back over, she lay on her back just staring at the ceiling for what felt like an eternity but when she looked back at her clock, it had only been 5 minutes. Grogily accepting that she wasn't tired, got up and slipped on her uniform. She looked at herself in the mirror, she played with her hair as she gazed at her tired looking reflection. She braided her long hair into two and went into the bathroom to wash her face. It seemed to make her look livelier. She sighed and listened to her heart and mind argue.

'What's wrong with me? Why am I feeling like this?' Her heart questionned.

'Pull yourself together. You shouldn't be feeling like this. You. Are. Dating!' Her mind contested.

'But then why does it feel so wrong?'

'Because you don't use ethics or reason. It's all this sentimental crap. Use some sense!'

Shaking her head she ripped the conflict apart. She sighed and went down to the kitchen. Surprised to see Eriol up that early, she went to the table and sat next to him.

"Why are up so early don't you need your rest?" He asked from behind his newspaper as he drank his coffee.

"How did you know it was me?"

"Tomoyo usually comes running down in a mad rush and yells at me to do something." He chuckled. Sakura sighed.

"Sounds like what I do to Syaoran." Her eyes glazed over with her hands supporting her head from under her chin.

"You're not exactly having the easiest life right now are you?" He folded his newspaper and adjusted his glasses. She looked up to him.

"I was getting better. A lot better. That was until... well yesterday." She sighed again. "And today I have to get it all straight." She looked down as she folded her arms. "The problem is I don't know how." She looked back at Eriol. He had an understanding look in his eyes as he smiled.

"I'm sure you'll figure it out when the time comes." He said and picked up his coffee and took a sip.

"You know Eriol, you remind me alot of my dad. What I can remember that is. You'll be a great father. Tomoyo's lucky to have you." Eriol's cheeks reddened a bit.

"I don't look that old do I?" They both laughed. Sakura's eyes began to regain that sparkled that made them special.

"I just don't know what to tell him. You've probably never been in a situation like this one, have you?" She said as she got up and got some coffee for herself. Sitting back down she stared at him, intent to hear his answer and maybe some advice.

"Unfortunate for you, no." Sakura sighed. "But as a guy I can tell you something about us." Sakura looked up ready to listen. "Most guys will want the plain truth. They may not accept it but at least you can say you told them, right? Syaoran's a little different. You can tell him the truth and he **will **accept it. Then he'll get defensive and sometimes even protective over the person. This is where you should be careful Sakura." She nodded. "If he really loves you like I love Tomoyo, he'll let you go and do your own thing. Inside though he'll be distraught and angry with himself. You two are very close right? You just have to make it easy for him to get over the whole situation, not neccessarily you. He's strong, he'll be able to handle it."

Just as he finished his sentence Tomoyo came rushing into the kitchen in full panic. Sakura looked at the clock they had been talking for nearly an hour. She jumped up and got a lunch packed. They both ran out of the house and raced to school.

Arriving at the school, Sakura went to her locker and took out her books she's need for the first two blocks. Closing her locker she came face to face with Camron. Smiling they greeted eachother and Camron walked to Sakura's class.

"Sakura? Are you feeling better from yesterday? You seemed really sad." She nodded. "Good. I was worried. I have to get to class. I'll see you at lunch." He smiled and kissed her on her cheek. She blushed and went to her desk. Sighing she sat down and was just about to open her text when she saw a hansom figure at the door, Syaoran. Looking around the class she realised that she was the only one he would come to see. Slowly she got up and unease filling her went to talk to him.

"Hi." She said as she stepped out of the class. He grunted and she looked at him puzzled. "Don't I get a hello?" She could tell he was avoiding her gaze. Looking back at her clasped hands she sighed. "If you didn't come to talk why did you come?" He said nothing. Suddenly his hand softly touched her face. She looked up at him. His eyes finally connected with her's. They were torn, not sure whether they should be angry or sad. They held passion, passion Sakura had never seen before but it was true, honest love. She torn her face away, feeling as dirty and unworthy to look in his eyes. He pulled it gently back. Her eyes began to mist.

"I'm sorry." She was taken aback. Why was he apologizing? "I shouldn't have done what I did. I knew you were with someone else. I'm sorry. Can you ever forgive me?" His voice was delicate and sincere. A smile spread across her face. Nodding her head, tears fell down her cheeks.

"How could I not?" She threw herself into his arms. In his embrace she felt safe, it felt right. Whispering into his ear, she said, "You'll always be my best friend. I trust you." Pulling away, she kissed him on the cheek and left for class, wiping her tears away.

Sitting down again she saw Cara sit down in front of her. When had she came in? Cara turned around and glared at her.

"You like playing with guys don't you?"

"Excuse me?" Sakura was shocked.

"You like making them believe they have a chance with you. You think they have no feelings." Her voice dripping with malice.

"How dare you make an assumtion about me! I don't 'play' with guys. I have no idea what you are talking about."

"Sure. I don't care if you 'play' with boys, just not my brother or guys I'm interested in, like Syaoran. You monopolise the dating world of the good guys. I don't like girls like that."

"I'm not playing with anyone. I'm dating Camron and nobody else." She shot coldly. "Just because Syaoran's my bestfriend doesn't mean I play with him. He's the closest thing I've got to a family." A glare now fixed on her face aswell.

"Stay away from him or you'll be sorry." Cara turned around to face the front.

"Where do you come off threatening me? I never did anything to you." Sakura hissed.

"Then how do you explain what you're doing now?" She spoke a little louder and turned around again her eyes filled with tears. "I never did anything to you and you're constantly picking on me." Everyone began to watch the two.

"What are you talking about?"

"See? You don't even know how mean you are!" With that she ran out of the class, 'crying'.

Everyone's stares fell on Sakura. She felt totally confused. The only she understood was that Cara was a total fraud.

* * *

Lunch soon came and everything felt less tense between her and Syaoran. Sitting at the table they talked and joked and ate their lunches. It felt good to be friends again without any awkwardness. That statement would have been true if Camron and Cara hadn't showed up. They sat on either side of them, each keen on seperating the two of them. Tension was evident after a couple minutes, on Syaoran's part. Cara wouldn't stop flirting with him so he decided to take her aside and talk to her. 

Walking away from the tables they approached the Cherryblossom tree. He turned to her.

"Cara stop flirting." He spoke gruffly. She looked utterly surprised.

"What?"

"I said stop flirting. I'm not interested."

"I like you Syaoran. I like you alot. I just can't stop flirting. I can't help it. I'm so attracted to you." She smiled sweetly.

"You know what? Stop pretending too. I can see straight through you act." He turned away.

"If I was Sakura you wouldn't mind would you, Syaoran?" She smirked. Syaoran turned around furiously.

"You don't know me or Sakura. Don't pretend you know about things you don't."

"She didn't return your feelings did she? Just wanted to be friends, right? Didn't want to endanger want you already had?" He clenched his fists, a glare on his face. She walked towards him and ran her hand along his back and then around to his chest. She looked up into his eyes. She stretched up, her head beside his ear. "You're too good for her. Take me instead." She licked his ear and stepped away, smirking. "Let me know what you decide. I'll be waiting." She ran her hand down his chest once more and left.

After she left a shiver ran down his spine and he chringed. Shaking the disturbing moment from his mind, he glanced over to Sakura and Camron. She was laughing and smilling, completely happy.

_Without him_.

**

* * *

**

**A/N:** Okay so that's another chapter! I was so sad when I wrote this. The Sakura declining Syaoran and all. I hope it works out... wait I wrote this I will find a way!

Okay sorry... well...

Want will come of Sakura and Syaoran's relationship now that they know of Syaoran's feelings?

Will Syaoran move on or will he do something rash?

Has Cara really started to weed into Syaoran's mind?

Stay tuned for the next chapter of

_**INNER STRUGGLES!**_

**(once again no release date.. sry)**

So Remember:

**More reviews - Happy Kikamo-chan - more inspiration - faster updates - funner stories ((-))**

Ja ne,

Kikamo-chan ((-))

5468 words


	7. Returning to Peace

**Inner Struggles**

**Summary:**

A lonely teenager tries to move on in life after her family mysteriously disappears. Left only with a shred of courage and one clue to finding her family, she sets out to the only place she can find sanctuary but ends up finding so much more.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Card captor Sakura, Clamp does. :sniff:sniff:

**Chapter 7:  
****Returning to peace**

Sakura packed up her homework into her bag. Sighing she closed her locker. Leaning against it she thought about what Cara had said earlier.

'_You like playing with guys don't you?...You like making them believe they have a chance with you. You think they have no feelings.'_

Why was it bothering her so much? They were just non-founded accusations, right? Syaoran was her best friend and she loved him that way, but could things ever be like they were before she found out how he felt? _NO._ She would just be leading him on. Plus she's with Camron and he deserved a chance. If so, why did she feel so dirty?

Dazing off, she continued to ponder. It wasn't until she was abruptly pounded on the head did she shake off her trance. Looking up, her eyes were furious. There stood Li Syaoran, her best friend and 'secret' admirer with a taunting smirk on his outrageously hansom face. Sakura's eye twitched, then suddenly,

"OWWWWW! THAT HURT!" She hollered in his face. He winced but shrugged it off.

"Sorry." He said quietly. "You just dazed off. You needed some awakening." His smirk was back. "Come on, let's go home." He grabbed her hand in his and started to pull her.

_'You like playing with boys don't you?'_

Sakura pulled her hand free but continued walking. Looking down, she began to walk faster. She wouldn't be that kind of girl. _Ever_.

Syaoran seemed utterly confused. He'd never seen her like this. Why was she being so sensitive. She wasn't like this in the Supply store.

_'She's different from the Supply store now. She's dating and has a boyfriend. AND IT'S NOT YOU!' _His mind shouted.

He ran his hand through his messy hair and just watched her walk. She stopped when she passed Camron's locker, but he wasn't going to. He kept on walking. He stopped at his car and got in to wait for Sakura. She didn't come. He checked his watch, _3:25_. She'd been talking to him for half an hour. What possibly could they be saying?

Putting on his sunglasses, he laid back and shut his eyes and waited. Soon he heard Sakura's laugh. Glancing to the school he saw her walking with Camron. A glare started to form across his regal face. Sakura skipped over, with a smile on her face.

"Syaoran! Don't wait up! I'm going for ice cream!" She said when she waved some couple meters away.

"Thanks, for telling me in advance." He growled sarcastically, which Sakura failed to notice.

"I'll have a Strawberry sundae with whipped cream, please." Sakura ordered politely.

"And I'll have a Chocolate sundae with chocolate sauce. Thanks." Camron turned to Sakura. She seemed rather on the fence today. Taking her hand he tried to comfort her. Sakura looked at him and smiled.

"What's wrong today? You seem kind of distant, _sweet-cheeks_." He asked concerned. Sakura froze up. She looked up in shock.

"Pardon?" He looked at her strangely.

"I asked if you were okay." Sakura shook her head.

"No, what did you call me?"

"Sweet-cheeks?" He replied, curiously. "Don't you like it? I heard it somewhere before I just don't know whe--"

"Syaoran." She interrupted. He looked confused. "Syaoran used to call me that." She took her hands away and put them on her lap.

"Are you okay? Really. Was there ever something between you two?" Sakura laughed under her breathe.

"Gawd no. I don't think there ever would." He still looked confused.

"Then why can't I call you that? I think it suits you. You do have a very cute face." He smiled. Just then the sundaes came. Once the waitress left, the conversation continued.

"I guess, it's just a name I don't really like hearing, that's all. Lots of memories attached to it. Things are different now." She looked up at him and placed her hands back on his. "I'm okay, just a little confused right now. But really I'm fine. Okay?" He looked at her sceptically at first but then waved it to the side.

They stayed in silence for a while just eating their ice-cream.

"So when do I get to meet your family, you've already met some of mine." Sakura squirmed in her seat.

"What's wrong?"

"Well the thing is..." She looked extremely uncomfortable. "My family is... Well it's a long story." She fumbled in her seat. "But to make it short I don't like talking about it."

"Is that why you live with Syaoran?" She looked up, her eyes were red from holding in the tears. He looked taken back. She checked her watch and gasped at the time.

"I... uh... really have to be going... sorry to spoil and all." She smiled weakly, as tears threatened to pore over. She got up and grabbed her bag.

"I'll walk you." He said quickly getting up too. "Just let me pay and..." She shook her head.

"I'm okay on my own." He looked defeated. Sighing he stepped towards her.

"I'm sorry, take care." He leaned forward and captured her lips in a powerful kiss. Her knees buckled as she deepened the kiss. Pulling back, her eyes were alive again with their vivid green colour. She smiled sweetly.

"It's not your fault." She whispered. She kissed him again before she left for home quickly.

* * *

She played with her keys in the lock. They just wouldn't go in. She had to stop by the grocery store on the way home too, didn't she? Juggling all the bags she was holding she was surprised she even got it in. Finally she was home. 

Entering, she saw Syaoran and their guest sitting on the sofa, obviously waiting for her. After lugging everything in, she put it on the counter and went to apologize.

"I'm so sorry I'm late Syaoran. I had to stop by the grocery store." She explained as she sat down. Syaoran didn't look too impressed, but the pretty girl with long black hair was beaming. "Oh, hi! You must be Meiling." She smiled.

"You must be Sakura then." She returned the favour. "We were just talking about life so, how's yours been going lately?" Sakura was glad that Meiling was as kind as Syaoran was when they first met.

"Actually, great! Thanks to Syaoran I have a roof over my head and someone to count on." She looked to him, he looked mad. "What?" He looked up at her and glared.

"Nothing." He shot venomously.

"You're lying." Meiling said. He shot her a glare too.

"Syaoran she's a guest!" Sakura shot.

"She's a cousin, not a guest." His gaze returned to her.

"Did something happen when I was gone?" She asked no one in particular. Silence. "Syaoran, can I speak with you for a moment? Privately." She stood up and walked into the kitchen.

"Excuse me." He said gruffly to Meiling.

Entering the kitchen he looked at a very angry Sakura.

"What?"

"What do you mean, 'what'? You're acting odd. What's the matter with you?" He looked at her demonically.

"Excuse me?"

"You're acting like a spoiled little 5 year old that didn't just get his way."

"Am not."

"Then what is it?" She said crossing her arms.

"You."

"Why are you blaming this on me?"

"You have no respect what so ever. You leave me sitting in my car for 30 minutes then when you come out you don't even come home! How else am I supposed to act?"

"You could be mature about it? I could have walked home you know... I do have legs."

"Don't be snide, Sakura." She flinched, she didn't like the way he said her name when he was angry.

"Are you telling me I'm not allowed to see my boyfriend?"

"Not if I don't like him! You don't care what I think!"

"You think it's easy for me to date him with you looming over me all the time!"

"Stop making excuses I don't do anything of the sort!"

"Then what are you doing now? You think it's easy for me to get on with my life after what happened? You're acting like my brother!"

"Good, because maybe you can run away from me too." He turned around. Tears dripped down her face, her mouth wide open and her heart torn in half.

"That's not fair." She said her voice wavering. Syaoran's eyes shot open and his anger was gone. Now he only felt regret. "You're using my dreams against me. Why? Do you think I don't deal with enough?" She backed away, wet face in her hands.

"No... Sakura... I'm sorry... I didn't mean it. I was just upset. I'm sorry. I just love you so mu---" He reached forward and was just going to touch her face when she hit his hand away.

"Don't! Don't tell me that!" He looked at her bewildered. "Do you know how dirty that makes me feel!" She screamed, her hands clenched in tight fists by her sides. "I can't return your feelings, so stop trying to trick me into saying I can!" Syaoran backed away.

"I'm sorry... I..." He didn't know what to say. Sakura wiped her tears and walked right passed him.

"I'm going for a walk. I'll be back soon." She grabbed her keys and jacket and left.

Sighing, he ran his fingers through his messy hair. He leaned against the counter top. Meiling stuck her

head into the kitchen.

"Are you okay?" She asked.

Silence.

"I think we need to talk."

* * *

Sakura wasn't too aware of where she was walking. She just wanted to clear her head. Finally she stopped walking. She just didn't feel like it anymore. She looked across the road at Penguin park. Shrugging she decided that she felt like a good swing. She crossed the road and walked to the swings and sat. Rocking back and forth she propelled herself through the air steadily. She zoned out and started to remember the past... when things were much simpler. 

_'It was summer and the sun was shining in the clear blue sky. There was never a nicer day. Sakura was 10 and life couldn't be better. She was on her annual trip to Tomoeda to visit her dear cousin, Tomoyo. Today they were at Tomoeda Park. It was beautiful with the lake and trees. It was the perfect place for a picnic._

_'Well for Sakura, it was almost perfect. The only thing present against her will was Touya. You would think that a 17 year old would have something better to do. She was fine with him except for his annoying taunting, but gratefully he had brought his girlfriend, Mizuki Kaho. Sakura always liked her. She was kind and pretty and seemed to understand her way better than Touya would ever._

_'Sakura and Tomoyo sat with each other along the river bank. They never had much time to spend with each other so any time they had was special. Sakura turned to Tomoyo and smiled. She smiled back. _

_'"Sakura, you'll come every summer right? No matter what?" Sakura nodded. "Good, 'cause I look forward to your visit all year." She smiled happily._

_'"I can't wait to grow up, can you Tomoyo?" Tomoyo nodded her head. "One day, I'll be an adult and I'll get married and have lots of kids. I'll move to Tomoeda and live next to you. We'll be best friends forever and ever." They both smiled in agreement. "It's a promise."_

_'"What's this about a 'kaijuu' making promises? I didn't know monsters were trustworthy?" Touya smirked and cocked an eye brow. Sakura turned and around and growled._

_'"Big Brother, go away! Don't call me names! It's not nice!" She pouted. "You know one day you'll regret being mean to me cause I'll move away and all I'll remember is how mean you were and so I'll never wanna visit." She huffed, her arms folded across her chest. Touya just looked at her and laughed._

_'"Sure 'kaijuu'." Rubbing her head he turned around and left.'_

Sakura felt tears come to her eyes. Why had she escaped? Why didn't she die with them? Why was she chosen to live and not them? Why?

_'"Happy 12th Birthday Sakura!" She smiled brightly._

_'"Thank you all for coming! It means a lot." All of her friends had come. Her dad and brother were there too. Her mom was in the kitchen cutting the cake. She loved them all tremendously, even Touya. He seemed more bearable now that he was going to University and wasn't living in the house anymore. She did miss him awfully, but she would never admit it._

_'The cake was made by her mom and was delicious. Someday she would have kids and they would have lots of friends and she'd bake them cakes, just like her mom. She smiled brightly. She had received many presents but her favourite was from Tomoyo. She couldn't be there so she had mailed it. It was a pinks dress with cherry blossoms on it and a red bow at the back. She guessed that she had designed it just for her and she was right. The small white tag said 'Courtesy of Tomoyo Daidoji Designs'. She would love it forever. Hugging it close she promised that this summer would be the best and she would make up for missing the last one._

_'Touya had given her a yellow stuffed bear. She loved it and named it Kero. She would sometimes pretend he could talk and that he was her guardian sworn to protect her and a deck of magical cards. She never told Touya because he would make fun and tease her. She was 12 years old and now in the sixth grade. She was growing up and too old to be playing child's games like that. Touya was less aggressive now-a-days. It probably had to do with Kaho breaking up with him. It hit the whole family really hard. She was missed a lot. Secretly, Sakura vowed that she would never hurt anyone the way Touya was hurt. She would always return love because there just wasn't enough in the world.'_

Sobbing Sakura let the tears run down her cheeks as she rocked back and forth on the swing. Her face was raw and she couldn't stop crying. Her emotions were free and they wouldn't be enclosed again. As she began to swing harder, her cries became fiercer. She became so wrapped up in her own misery she hadn't noticed the sky's sorrow as it began to cry with her. Soon her clothes were soaked through but she didn't care. She wanted to die. She felt horrible, no life was worth this much pain. Finally she stopped swinging and just sat in the rain, entranced by the sand beneath her feet.

"Sakura!" She swore she heard someone scream her name, but it didn't matter. Nothing mattered.

"Sakura!" She was pulled by her trance by two strong hands gripping onto her arms tightly. She looked up into their warm, scared eyes. Suddenly she was aware of her sodden body and began to shiver uncontrollably. "Sakura, let's get you inside." Syaoran pulled her so she was standing up. Taking her hand he tried to lead her home. She wouldn't budge. "Sakura we have to go. Now." A thundering roar came from the sky as it took its turn to scream in torment. She looked at him confused.

"Why are you doing this?" She asked like a child, totally bewildered. "I'm a horrible person. I've broken important promises to myself and to important people close to me. I don't deserve to live." She moved as though intending to sit back down but Syaoran grabbed her firmly and look into her eyes.

"You aren't a bad person. You live the way you have to and survived a loss few others will ever have to endure. You are brave and strong. You make decisions that even some adults find hard to draw conclusions to." She looked at him admiringly.

"How can you say those things after how horribly I've treated you?"

"You didn't do anything wrong. I deserved what ever you did to me. My loving you shouldn't have ever been your problem. I was wrong to make it so. Come on, let's go home." He grabbed her hand again and started walking. She tugged on it again and he turned around. He looked at her, face raw and tears streaming down again.

"I want... I want you to... I want you to be my best friend again." She ran into his arms and sobbed. "Can things go back to the way they were? Please. Please. Can they? Please." She totally lost control and collapsed in his arms. He caught her and picked her up and carried her like a baby. She was still shaking and her body was frozen. He looked down at her as he walked. Who would have known under that strong exterior that she was just a child, wanting normality.

* * *

Sakura woke up in her bed, the storm was still blazing on with no end in sight. She rolled over to look at her clock. It read: _'1:30'. _She rolled over again and tried to sleep. She was unsuccessful. She lay in bed for a while until her ears tuned into the happenings of the other room. Someone was watching TV. She got up and opened the door and peered into the living room. There Syaoran sat on the fold-away-bed. She stepped out into the hall and walked towards him. He heard her foot steps and looked at her. He was taken aback but then gave her a comforting look, a relieved look. She walked closer and he muted the TV. 

"I'm sorry did I wake you?" She shook her head. They were soon accompanied with an awkward silence. Sakura fidgeted with her hands then looked at Syaoran again.

"Thank you." He looked confused. "For last night." He smiled back at her.

"Come sit for a sec. I want to tell you something." She went and sat next to him. "I meant what I said." He looked at her, straight in the eyes. "I should have never made it your problem." She looked down at her feet and played with her toes. He tried to catch her eye again but she was putting up worthy competition. Slowly, he took his hand and touched her face and she turned it quickly back to him, surprised. "I want things back to normal too." She smiled and hugged him tightly.

"Thank you." He hugged her back, her scent engulfing him.

"Did you want to watch some TV with me?" She nodded and leaned on his shoulder.

They watched TV for hours. At least Syaoran had, Sakura had fallen asleep curled up next to him under the blankets.

Things were back to_ 'normal'_.

* * *

The next morning, Syaoran woke up to the smell of pancakes and French toast. Groggily he spoke. 

"Thanks Sakura... I owe you one." He closed his eyes again and almost drifted off to sleep again.

"Don't you mean, 'Thanks Meiling'?"

His eyes shot open and he sat up instantly. His sudden movements caused a certain sleepy-head to grumble beside him. Quickly he looked at Meiling then at Sakura then it dawned on him that there were two women in his home. He looked down at Sakura and noticed her lopsided clothing that revealed quite a bit of herself to him. He abruptly turned his gaze to Meiling who looked at him sceptically. Then he became deafly aware that was wearing only a pair of old shorts and no shirt. His face turned crimson. Quickly he got up from the bed. Sakura moaned as he left and he tried extraordinarily hard not to imagine any other sounds she would make as reactions to his actions. He scurried to his room and got changed. Returning to the kitchen he glared at Meiling.

"Had a rough night?" She asked kiddingly.

"Nothing happened. We just fell asleep rather awkwardly." She turned around and put some more batter on the griddle.

"Okay. Then she's not opened yet. That part of her life isn't expired yet?" She turned around and smiled ridiculously.

"Stop with the innuendo already! Even if she was, it wouldn't have been from me." He sat down at the table with a huff.

"Angry about that?"

"No. You just frustrate me. Now I know why I so willingly left China." Meiling plopped a plate on the table in front of him. He took a fork and stabbed a pancake and stuffed it in his mouth.

"You used to live in China?" Both Meiling and Syaoran turned abruptly to an awoken Sakura. She looked more decent now that she was conscious.

"Yah. You didn't think the name Li was Japanese did you?" Syaoran confirmed as he ate more pancakes.

"I don't know I just assumed you were from Japan. Your Japanese isn't bad or anything." She sat down across from him. Meiling gave her a plate too. "Thank you Meiling. You really shouldn't have cooked breakfast. You're the guest." Meiling just shrugged.

"I'm used to it. That's how it is when I visit Syaoran here. I'm his temporary mother." She stuck her tongue out at him. "So what do you want to do today?"

Sakura's face lit up and she clapped her hands together.

"I know! The Candle festival! It's always really fun. I do it every year with Tomoyo." Without waiting for any agreement on the subject she shot up and grabbed the phone. Syaoran could hear shrieks from the other end of the phone line. Today was going to be long day.

"Who's Tomoyo?"

* * *

It was a nice day out and there was no sign of the storm from the preceding night. Sakura was ready for a day filled with fun and wasn't going to let anything get in the way of it. She had dragged Syaoran along against his will and Meiling was a good sport and helped. She had told Tomoyo to bring Eriol so Syaoran wasn't surrounded by just girls. It had been so long since the four of them had done anything together. Sakura wanted so much to make Meiling feel welcome too. They were all a family. 

"Wow! Look at that!" Sakura looked up at a huge roller coaster. "That's gotta be the world's biggest roller coaster." Looking back to her friends, her and Tomoyo shared bright smiles.

"LET'S GO!" They raced to the line. Eriol and Meiling followed and slowly Syaoran did the same. The line was long but they were prepared and ready.

"Okay, so partners." Meiling looked around. She looked at Syaoran who wasn't standing in the line. "Aren't you coming Syaoran?" He shook his head.

"Why not?" Sakura asked from the front of the group.

"He's afraid of them, always has been. I thought he would have out-grown that irrational fear by now though." Meiling explained. Sakura looked at Syaoran sadly, accepting his decision. "Well that solves the pairing problem. Tomoyo and Eriol can go together and Sakura and I can go too." Just then Eriol poked his head from the line.

"Actually, Tomoyo and Sakura can ride together and save both our ears." He smiled and kissed Tomoyo on the forehead as she pouted. With all that settled, the line seemed to move much quicker and soon they were all on the roller coaster.

Syaoran just stood back and watched. They were having fun and just watching them was enough. No one would ever get him on one of those. Looking around he spotted the two people he clearly didn't want to see. Cara and Camron Di, the two people he hated most. Turning he hoped that when they walked by they wouldn't see him. Too much of a hope.

"Hey Syaoran." He looked at Cara as she walked over to him. He waved reluctantly. "You're not here alone are you?" He shook his head.

"No, Sakura and the others are on the rollercoaster." He pointed up to the ride. Camron had finally come over, obviously hearing Sakura's name.

"Hey Li." Syaoran just nodded, a small, minute glare on his face. "You here with Sakura?" He nodded again.

"Yeah so?" Raising his hands in defeat Camron backed away.

"Sorry, don't get all defensive. It was just a question. I am allowed to ask about her." Silence was their guest as the rest of the park howled with laughter and delight. "So, how is she? She was distraught yesterday at the ice cream shop." He looked at Syaoran, seemingly concerned.

"Why don't you ask her yourself?" Syaoran answered as he heard a bunch of giggling girls walk over; Tomoyo and Sakura.

"Did you have fun just watching Syaoran?" She asked as she walked up to them. He grunted. Sakura finally noticed Camron and Cara. She smiled. "Camron! What are you doing here?" She walked over and kissed him on the cheek and held his hand.

"Well I was here with Cara for a day of fun, and it looks like it just got funner." He smiled down at her. Soon Meiling and Eriol came over, walking rather tipsy. Sakura looked at them concerned.

"Are you guys okay?" They both groaned.

"That's why I don't do roller coasters." Syaoran just shook his head. Cara eyed Meiling suspiciously. Sakura noticed this and frowned. Quickly covering it up with introductions.

It was 12 o'clock and they all headed for the food courts. Much to the dislike of Syaoran, Camron and Cara chose to tag along. Sitting at the tables they all ate in silence, unusual for them. It was Meiling who brought up the conversation.

"So Eriol, what is it exactly you do?" She asked as she ate some soup.

"Actually I run Daidoji Designs." He smiled as he took Tomoyo's hand. Just then they heard a gasp. Every looked at Cara.

"Oh my God. You own Daidoji Designs! I love them. It's my favourite designer!" Her face lit up. "Oh my gosh. Could you arrange a meeting with the Designer? Please. She's my idol!" Everyone but the two Di began to laugh. "What?" They laughed harder. "What did I say?" Tomoyo quieted everyone down.

"It's nothing you said. It's just you already know her." She smiled. Cara looked confused. "Okay, let's see." She tapped her chin, then suddenly outstretched her hand. Cara uncertain took her hand. "Hi. I'm Tomoyo Daidoji, I'm the designer for Daidoji Designs." Realisation dawned on Cara her eyes bright again. She began to laugh at her stupidity.

"No wonder, I always thought they had a teenager's mind working behind it all." She began to eat again. "Where do you get all your ideas?" Tomoyo looked at Sakura.

"Actually, I've only ever made them for one person." Sakura shook her head. "I started designing for Sakura when I was little, she always had these ugly no-name clothes. I just had to but something better on the market that gave an alternative to girls like her." Cara looked at Sakura jealously.

"You are so so so lucky. I would kill to be in your shoes." Everyone went silent. "Not literally." She cleared up. The silence came back shortly.

"So Meiling, what do you do?" Camron asked. Everyone agreed with this question. Meiling never seemed to talk about work or anything related.

"Oh. I work for the government. Confidential stuff. Can't really talk about it." That answered everyone's questions. As everyone went back to eating, Meiling sent a tentative look to Syaoran who returned it.

Much to Syaoran's dismay, Cara and Camron both decided the day would be better spend in Sakura and Syaoran's company. The day was supposed to be for Sakura and Syaoran to ease back into their best-friend shoes but clearly that wasn't about to happen with the Di's constant presence. They had gone on almost all the rides; from the roller coaster to the Ferris wheel. They had played some of the carnival games. Syaoran's moral was boosted when Camron challenged him to a ball throw game and he beat him with a substantial lead. He also seemed to be better and the strength tests too, especially at the Hammer game; (The one where you hit the base of the scale and a piece of metal shoots up and hits a bell.) Camron didn't even hit the bell!

Finally the day was ending and the only thing left to do was the 'Tunnel of Love'. Tomoyo insisted on it. Naturally, she dragged Eriol on it. Sakura wasn't very comfortable about the whole idea because she didn't exactly love anyone at the moment but stood in line with Camron anyways. They held hands as the line moved forward, thought Sakura often threw tentative glances at Syaoran as the entrance became closer. At least if she was standing there with him she would feel safe because she knew he genuinely loved her.

As their boat drew to the loading deck, Camron jumped in and helped her in after him. Sitting down on the bench they cuddled for a while as the boat went with the courant and through the tunnel. They sat in silence until Camron turned towards her, she looked confused.

"Do you love me?" He asked. She looked surprised.

"Camron, we've been dating for barely a week!" He looked crest-fallen but leaned forward and kissed her with a great passion that she never knew. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled herself closer to him as they deepened it and as their tongues began to play. He ran his hand from her cheek down her neck and across her chest to her side where it slid to her bottom and pulled her under him. He was on top of her as their hearts began to beat faster and faster. He kissed her down her neck and she moaned with pleasure. Her leg wrapped around him as their bodies swayed rhythmically with each other.

Suddenly, Sakura's mind wandered as she thought about the person she would want to touch her that way. She saw a hansom man with powerful brown eyes, a firm chest and messy brown hair that she loved to play with. Immediately her eyes shot open as she remembered where she was and who she was with as a strong hand was playing in the insides of her thighs and a mouth that showered her in kisses. She tensed up and drew back. The man with blue eyes looked confused. She couldn't deny the attraction between them but gathered the rest of her dignity and sat up straight, face flushed.

"What's wrong?" He asked huskily as he nuzzled her cheek and neck.

"Stop it Camron." She said. He looked at her oddly.

"Why?" He said as he slid his up her knee to her hip ready to pull her under again. "Don't you like the way it feels?"

"I'm sorry Camron." She said as she took his hands off her. She looked deeply into his eyes. "I'm not ready to do anything more then that. I need time. I need to know you better." He nodded in recognition.

"I see your point. I understand. I shouldn't have pushed." She smiled thankfully at him.

"Thank-you." She leaned towards him and sat close to his chest and still beating heart from the adrenaline of the moment. She looked at the tunnel for the first time since the entered it. It was actually quite lovely, with hearts and swans and little cupids everywhere. No wonder it was a couple thing. Nobody else in their right mind would go in there with anyone else but the person they were seeing.

* * *

Returning home after the long day of 'fun' was quite exhausting. Camron kept insisting on going out for diner and continuing the day further. It wasn't until Tomoyo nearly fall over from tiredness did the rest of the group clue in that it was enough for one day. Reaching the apartment, Sakura fell on the couch and rested for a while as Meiling and Syaoran made a small dinner. When dinner was served they all ate hungrily and then sat back to watch a movie. When it was getting late, Sakura decided to turn in and Syaoran followed her. When she popped out of her room to say a last good-night she found only Syaoran sitting on the hide-a-bed. He looked up at her and smiled. She approached him and sat down. 

"I'm sorry the day was a complete bust. I know you wanted it just to be the five of us." He shook his head.

"Nah, I understand. You deserved some time with your boyfriend too." This surprised Sakura.

"So are you going to play nice?" She smirked and he smirked back. He pounced on her and pinned her down on the bed.

"Syaoran!" She exclaimed as he brushed his nose up the side of her face. She pulled away.

"Just playing." He said as he rolled off her, her face crimson. "I don't think you should sleep here tonight… actually any more." She looked confused. Her insides where torn that he was denying her his warmth, but even more, what his touch did to her. She looked to him to explain. "You're seeing someone and as much as it pains me, I shouldn't interfere." She was about to protest when he placed his finger on her soft pink lips. "I know I can provide you with comfort but you are too much of a temptation to me. I don't want to hurt you. I don't want to be the cause if you have to leave your boyfriend. That's never a supplier for a good reputation for either of us." She looked like she understood so he left his finger fall.

"You're right. Thanks." She leaned forwards and kissed him on the cheek. The sensation for both was electrifying, the attraction present. Pulling away slowing she looked into his eyes and for the first time so the passion that was held hostage in them and admired the control and restraint he showed towards it. Deep down inside she yearned for him too, but she would never tell a soul.

Stepping onto the floor she retreated to her room and sat on her bed pondering the fire that had been ignited twice that day, both a different but similar flame. Easing down into her bed, she snuggled into the pillows and comforter. She let her mind swim through her thoughts and soon they settle on the images of her consummating her love… to who she would never reveal. Not even to herself.

* * *

The rest of Meiling's stay was quite ordinary. After Sakura's moving experience with Camron she scarcely went one day without a phone call from him. He seemed quite determined to see her more often so that she could know him better. This made their relationship uneasy for Sakura who was juggling school and her job and trying to mend things with Syaoran on top of it all. 

After a couple weeks had past since Meiling's visit, Sakura celebrated her one month anniversary with Camron. He was very excited and had planned a big celebration for the two of them. He left a message on the answering machine for Sakura to meet him at the 'Tomoeda Empress Hotel' for a wonderful dinner at 7 o'clock. She got all dressed up with the help of Tomoyo. She wore a long red dress with sequins and cherry blossoms along the hem and a slit up the side that reached just above her knee. Her hair was done half up in ringlets and a pink flower pinned in the hair. Her make-up was light but elegant. Before leaving she was forced to model the look in front of Syaoran. He was floored, she was drop-dead gorgeous. Tomoyo left soon after and Sakura was sitting at the kitchen table waiting for 6:30 when Syaoran would drive her there. Finally the time came and few words where spoken as he drove her to her date.

As he stopped in front of the hotel he turned to her before she got out.

"You looked really beautiful Sakura." She smiled a thank-you. "I know I don't have a right but I want to warn you." Her smile faded. "As your best friend," he began and her frown withdrew a bit. "I want to tell you that this is really strange that he'd make such a big deal over a one month anniversary. Be careful. He might be expecting more then you want to let happen." She raised an eye brow, unconcerned. "If you need me don't be afraid to call. Got it? Your safety is more important than **any** relationship."

"Thank-you, but I'll be fine. I can handle myself." She said as she got out of the car and walked towards the hotel feeling butterflies after what Syaoran had said.

**

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**A/N:** Dun dun dun dunnnnnnnnn... okay so I'll update sooner and hopefully this story is getting more intoxicating. It'll all start to get more intriguing and unstoppable soon. The Climax is coming!

**Will Syaoran insecurities about Sakura's safety become reality?**

**What does Camron really want from Sakura?**

**How is Syaoran really coping with their relationship?**

**Will S+S EVER get together?**

**Stay tuned for the next installment of...**

_**INNER STRUGGLES!**_

See you soon. Remember

**More reviews - Happy Kikamo-chan - more inspiration - faster updates - funner stories ((-))**

Ja ne,

Kikamo-chan ((-))

6158 words


	8. Devil's Grip

**Inner Struggles**

**WARNING: THIS IS NOT 'KIDDY' CONTENT. ADULT SUBJECT MATTER. READER DISCREATION ADVISED.**

**Summary:**

A lonely teenager tries to move on in life after her family mysteriously disappears. Left only with a shred of courage and one clue to finding her family, she sets out to the only place she can find sanctuary but ends up finding so much more.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura, Clamp does. :sniff:sniff:

**WARNING: THIS IS NOT 'KIDDY' CONTENT. ADULT SUBJECT MATTER. READER DISCREATION ADVISED.**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 8:**

**Devil's Grip**

Entering the Hotel Lobby she looked around for Camron. Suddenly she spotted him in a nice suit. Walking towards him she smiled.

"You look gorgeous tonight." He smiled devishly. She mumbled a thank-you. They walked together into the restaurant. It was filled with high-class people and the food looked extremely expensive. Speaking to the server they got a table right away.

Sitting down they ordered and began to talk.

"I can't believe it's already been a month." Said Sakura as she took a sip of her water. "It felt like yesterday you asked me out." He smiled.

"I know. Doesn't this just feel right?" He said as he reached for her hand. She just smiled. "I was thinking we could go back to my place after to watch a movie or something. What do you say?" Sakura nodded.

_'Back to his place? What does he really expect from me?'_ She thought worriedly.

"Hey, are you okay?" She looked up at him.

"Yah, it's nothing. Just thinking." She smiled. "What kind of movie were you wanting to watch after?" She asked conversationally after there food came.

"I was thinking about Horror or Suspense. I love those kinds of movies, you?" Sakura blanched. "What's wrong? You don't like them?" She shook her head.

"When I was little, my brother always scared me. He said he could talk to ghosts. It would always freak me out when he'd start talking to nothing and things would get cold. On top of it, when he'd watch a scary movie he'd always say things at the most craziest part and it'd make me climb the walls." She shivered. "I never watch Horror movies. Ever." When she looked back at Camron he was smiling which made her feel uncomfortable. "What?"

"You've never talked about your family before. It always seemed taboo." He ate some more of his chicken merrily. "I'm glad you trust me enough."

"I guess the right subjects make me relax, you know. I'm starting to talk more about them, Syaoran's a big help there." She smiled when she thought about all the great talks she had had with Syaoran about her past. She felt so open with him. Then she remembered she was with Camron and she looked at him, he didn't seem too keen that she was talking to Syaoran about these things and not him.

"What's your relationship with him anyways? You always talk about him." Camron sounded a bit annoyed. Sensing this, Sakura answered quickly.

"He's just my best-friend. We kid around a lot that's all. He was there when I needed him the most and I'll never forget that. He looks out for me and I'm thankful he's there." That didn't seem to help with Camron's sour face. "Look let's talk about something else." She ate some more of her food. "How has Cara been lately?" She asked, seemingly interested.

"Fine, she's a bit obsessed though." Sakura looked confused.

"With what?"

"Actually it's a who, Syaoran." A few sentences and they were back to Syaoran.

"I see." She said quietly. They finished off their meals in silence.

Camron paid for the bill and they left in his car for his place. Feeling uncomfortable with the situation, Sakura reached into her purse and turned on her cell phone, courtesy of Tomoyo. When they got to his apartment, Sakura realized he lived alone. They entered his apartment and went to the living room and sat on the couch. Picking a movie seemed difficult because they both had different interests. Finally they settled on one and they began to watch it. By the time it was finished it was already extremely late and Sakura wanted to go home.

Pulling out her cell phone she began to dial for Syaoran's cell, he said he had wanted to pick her up. Camron put his hand on her cell phone to stop her dialing.

"Why don't you stay the night? It's late after all." Sakura froze. She looked at him and he smiled seductively.

"I don't think I should, I think I should go home." That wasn't what he wanted to hear.

"I want you to move in with me." He said bluntly.

"What?" She replied just as blunt. "I've known you for a month and you want me to move in with you?"

"Yes." He said pushing her hand down to her side so she couldn't finish dialing.

"We're moving too fast." She exclaimed starting to panic. _'What does he want from me?'_

"Don't you love me?" He shot, almost glaring from frustration.

"I think you need some rest, you're acting strange. I'll just go." She pulled her cell up again to finish dialing. He took her wrists fiercely and pushed her against the wall. She was shocked.

"Answer the question!" She remained silent. He looked her straight in the eyes and said, "I want you. Right here, right now." He pushed himself against her and kissed her possessively. She tried to free herself but he was too strong.

"Stop. Please. Don't. Do. This." She whined through his forceful kisses. He roamed his hands down her body as she struggled against him. He started to pull up her dress when she screamed; though not for long, he kissed her to muffle them. Tears started to run down her cheeks when he dragged her to his bedroom and tied her hands to his headboard. She couldn't fight him; he was too strong. With all the commotion she forgot she still held her phone. Craning her neck she finished dialing. She heard an answer on the other end and yelled for help. Syaoran was coming. She used all her strength to keep her legs closed as he tried to rape her. She screamed and cried as he pleasured himself.

_'Syaoran... where are you?' _She thought to herself. _'I need you know. Help me. Please.' _

Camron pulled on her dress and it slid to her knees. She cried harder as he touched her in places she didn't want touched and tried to squirm from his grasps. He was still stronger and showed no signs of stopping. Her cries became hysterical as he lay upon her, defiling her body's pure skin. She kept her body tight as he roamed it freely.

"SYAORAN!" She screamed. Suddenly Camron stopped. For a moment she thought he would let her go but he hit her firmly across the face. She lay there stunned.

"I knew you were his bitch. I could see it in your eyes." He said as he straddled her. "That's what made me want you more." He ran his hands across her bare chest as he bent down and licked her neck. "Forbidden fruit. How much I would love for him to find out I touched you first, made you feel first." Sakura shivered under his touch and cringed from revultion. She spat at his smirking face.

"You're a pathetic boy. Nothing more." Her face was stern.

"I was going to play a bit more," he scowled as he wiped her spit from his face. "But I might as well do it now." He traced his hands along the sides of her legs. To her horror, they relaxed and he pulled them apart. "I've been with many girls. I know how to get what I want." He whispered maliciously.

"No, please. DON'T!" She cried. Before Camron could move anywhere, his face collided with a flying fist.

There stood Syaoran, infuriated. Camron flew off her and she quickly pulled herself together. She sat huddled against the headboard.

"What kind of scum are you!" Syaoran yelled at Camron. "What kind of guy tries to rape his girlfriend!" He advanced towards him and started hitting him again and again. Sakura cowered and tried to cover herself. She felt dirty and almost deserving of this pain she felt inside.

She felt someone sit beside her and she looked cautiously at Syaoran. New tears poured down her bruised face. She cried into her tied hands. Syaoran looked at her with worried eyes.

"Are you alright?" He whispered kindly. She shook her head.

"Syaoran," she whispered through staggered breath. "If you hadn't come," she began to hyperventilate. He tried calming her but when he touched her shoulder she flinched. He drew his hand back quickly.

"Shh... I'm here now. I'm going to get you out of here. Just let me," he reached for her tied hands. "Untie your hands." She leaned back a bit so he could get to her hands. She realized she was naked but it didn't matter so much with Syaoran. Her wrists were red and sore. Syaoran went and picked up her dress from the ground. He handed it to her. "Here get dressed, we should leave." He looked down at an unconscious Camron. "Best before he wakes up, I think." He gave her a little smile, letting her know things would be all right.

When they got home, Sakura took a shower. She felt dirty and gross. She got out and dried her hair. Before heading to her room to turn in she looked for Syaoran in the living room. He wasn't there. She peered into his bedroom and there he sat facing the window in the darkness. She clenched her towel tighter and walked into his room.

"Syaoran," she said attentively. "I want to thank you; for saving me tonight." She paused. He didn't move. "Syaoran, you were right. I should have never trusted... him." She cringed at the thought of him. Syaoran still didn't move. She took a step towards him. "I want to tell you something." She went and sat beside him. She looked at his face, he seemed to be listen but thinking hard about something. She grabbed his hand and he finally looked at her.

"Sakura," he said touching her face. "I hate seeing you hurt. I think tonight would be classified as hurt. I know you don't like hearing this but I love you. I'm always going to protect you from anything I can." He ran his hand through her hair and she blushed. He looked at her quizzically. He pulled her towards him and just as their lips were about to touch she whispered.

"I love you Syaoran." They met full force, passionately. He slid his hand down her back, across the towel and she wrapped her free arm around his neck. When they parted, her eyes misted. He looked almost frightened. He was about to ask why when she interrupted. "The whole time he was doing that stuff to me," she whispered in his ear as she hugged him close. "I knew you would save me. I was thinking of you and how much I regretted not telling you. I love you. I really do." She pulled back and her eyes shone. She kissed his again, and he kissed her back.

Her lips on his lips felt right, destined. They fell back together on his bed. Her insides pulsed in anticipation at his touch. She let the towel go, her body exposed. She took his hand and ran it down her chest and her side.

"I'm yours, Syaoran. Now and forever." She pulled herself up to him and kissed him. He slid his hands under her and pushed her against him. She pulled off his shirt and unbuttoned his pants as he worshiped her. They're bodies moved in sync and they sparked at each other's touch.

Suddenly, Syaoran pulled away and stopped. He sat at the edge of the bed. Sakura looked at him funnily. She sat up straight and pulled the sheets to her.

"Syaoran, what's wrong?" She went and sat behind him, pressing her body to him. She rested her chin on his shoulder. She kissed him on his neck but he still didn't move.

"You're just doing this because of tonight. You're distraught and confused. I don't want to hurt you." He finally said. His head nodded forward and he ran his hand through his hair. She wrapped her arms around his bare chest. He rubbed his hands along her soft skin.

"You really think that?" She asked hurt as she rested her head on his back. Resolved, she stood up and walked in from of him. He looked up at her beautiful body. She sat down, straddling him and wrapped her arms around his neck, her fingers playing with his hair. He looked taken aback. She kissed him lovingly. She looked into his eyes, and truthfully said. "You're the only thing I'm 100 certain about. I love you and always will." The look in her eyes was proof enough that it was the right thing for them. He pulled her closer and kissed her. He pushed her on his bed and she moaned with pleasure. The only words they spoke were "I love you" as they shared a night of blissful pleasure.

* * *

The next morning came too soon for either of them. Sakura was the first to wake. She stared up at her lover and traced circles on his muscular chest. She laid her cheek over his beating heart as she remembered the previous night. She blushed and smiled as she thought of the things they did to each other. Soon she felt his arm tighten and looked up at him. She kissed him softly.

"Good morning." She whispered. His eyes were warm.

"Good morning, Sweet-cheeks." He said gruffly. Sakura giggled. She wrapped her leg around his. She kissed him again.

"I like waking up next to you." She purred. He chuckled.

"So do I." He ran his hand along her face as she smiled.

"Do we have to get up? Can't we stay like this forever?" Syaoran looked at his alarm clock on his side table.

"Well." He said. "We missed half of school already. So why not?" He bent forwards and kissed her softly. She melted under his lips. She rolled onto her back and he followed. Once again he lay on top of her and they began to worship each other.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang and they both froze. Looking at the clock they panicked. It was lunch at school, which meant that if they hadn't shown up, Tomoyo would. Quickly scrambling for clothes, Sakura grabbed a baggy shirt and pulled it over her small body. She gave one last kiss to Syaoran before running to the door as she tried to tame her hair. He laughed to himself as she scurried everywhere.

Looking through the peephole, Sakura saw a worried looking Tomoyo. Slowly she opened the door a pinch. Tomoyo looked at a blushing Sakura suspiciously. Then she noticed her attire and a smile spread across her face followed by a loud squeal. She was jumping up and down when Sakura dragged her in. Sitting her on the couch, Tomoyo looked at her intently.

"So, aren't you going to tell me who?" Sakura didn't need to as Syaoran came into the living room with just his pants on. Tomoyo watched the way they looked at each other and she squealed again. Syaoran sat behind Sakura and she snuggled to him.

"When did this happen?" Tomoyo asked excitedly. "I want all the details." She smiled brightly. Sakura looked up to Syaoran. They both looked serious. "Wait a second! What happened to Camron? Yesterday was your one month Sakura." Sakura squirmed.

"He tried to rape me, after the dinner." Tomoyo looked horrified. "Syaoran came just in time. If I didn't have the cell phone you gave me Tomoyo, I wouldn't have been able to..." She began to shake. Syaoran comforted her.

"I guess that explains the black eye on Camron's face." Tomoyo said. This caused both Sakura and Syaoran happiness. "Well I'm glad everything turned out well for you two." She chimed on a happier note.

Syaoran started to play with Sakura's shirt and she was messaging his free hand.

"You know Sakura," he teased. "I'm going to need this shirt back eventually." He smiled hintingly.

"Well you'll have to fight for it, you know I won't give it up without one." She purred playfully.

"That can be arranged." He said softly. Quickly Sakura jumped up and skipped to his room. Syaoran looked at Tomoyo apologetically.

"I think I'll head back to school. I'll tell the office you're both sick today." She smiled sweetly. She went to the door. "I'm so happy for you two." She added as she opened the door.

"Syaoran! Don't you want your shirt?" They heard Sakura call from his room. They both chuckled at her obvious scheme.

"I'll see you two tomorrow." Tomoyo said firmly. Syaoran nodded.

"Bye, see you." He locked the door behind her then turned to the hallway.

"Syaoran!" Called a sweet voice. He just chuckled and walked back to his room. If this was love, it could get tiring but he'd do his best to get caught up.

* * *

Later that night both Sakura and Syaoran were exosted. They had decided they had had enough for one day so they just lay together and talked. Suddenly Sakura got quite.

"Sakura? What's wrong?" She pulled back from him so she could look him in the eye.

"Syaoran," she asked attentively. "How many other girls have you... been with?" She looked at him seriously. He leaned back against the wall. He looked at her just as serious.

"Honestly," he ran his hand through his hair. "One." Sakura looked down and pulled the sheet closer to her, suddenly self-conscious. He looked at her curiously.

"Who was she?" She mumbled under her breath quietly. She started to play with the sheets on the bed, diverting his gaze. He softly reached forwards and lifted her chin to look at her face. She looked a little sad.

"It was when I lived in China. Her name was Chan-mei. I was 16 and she and I had been dating for close to two years." His eyes glazed over as he remembered. "She had long black hair that curled loosely all the way down her back. Her eyes were a soft blue, like the sky." She was crest-fallen, Chan-mei sounded much prettier than she did.

"Did you love her?" Syaoran was pulled from his memories. He looked at a hurt Sakura. Finding it easiest to answer her questions than not, he answered solemnly.

"I did. On her sixteenth birthday I was going to propose. I think she would have said yes." He looked at Sakura trying to tell her through his eyes that none of this mattered anymore but she looked even sadder.

"What happened?" She asked as her voice almost cracked.

"She went missing." Sakura looked up shocked. "I usually walked home with her from school but she insisted on walking alone the day before." He looked down as though the memory hurt. "A week later they found her a couple miles out of town in a ditch. She was dead and by the looks of it raped." He clenched the sheets tightly in his fists. Sakura crawled to him and kissed him softly on the cheek. He looked up at her, pain vivid in his eyes. He ran his hand down her face and through her hair lovingly. "That's why I can't stand guys like that." He said firmly. "Twice now women I love have been put in those kinds of situations. Only once could I make a difference." He pulled her towards himself and hugged her tightly. She let him touch her skin but still felt self-conscious.

"Why did you want to know?" He asked tenderly as he stroked her hair.

"I wanted to know if you thought 'this' was something special, sacred." Syaoran pulled Sakura up from her shoulders and looked at her strangely.

"Don't you think this is special?" He asked her almost hurt.

"You know I do, but some guys think it's what we're here for." She looked down again. "I've only ever been with one man; and that's you Syaoran." She smiled. "This means forever to me." She leaned forwards and kissed him.

Lying against him she ran hand across his stomach, it growled.

"I think your hungry." She whispered. He just chuckled.

"I guess so." They both got up and dressed before going into the kitchen to eat.

* * *

The following day at school Sakura felt extremely lonely without Syaoran. News had spread about Sakura and Camron's break-up but the circumstances were still hazy. Sakura didn't go anywhere alone, Syaoran made sure of that. He had charged Tomoyo with the duty of being her 'body-guard' during and in-between classes. Obviously Sakura thought this protection absurd but agreed to it anyway. They stayed as far away from Cara as humanly possible though it was quite difficult with her being in all their classes all the time. Soon all the craziness ended and lunch was Sakura's time to spend with Syaoran. They met at the usual table where Chiharu, Takashi and Rika were already sitting.

Sitting next to Syaoran, Sakura rested her head on his shoulder. He looked down at her.

"I missed you." She whispered. He smiled and wrapped his arm around her.

"Me too." He kissed her on the forehead. She looked up at him and smiled. Quickly she pulled out her lunch and started eating. Syaoran followed suit. They both looked up and noticed Chiharu, Takashi and Rika staring at them in awe. Sakura blushed and Syaoran just smirked. Placing his hand on Sakura's head he explained. "Sakura's my girlfriend. You didn't think I'd be single forever did you?"

As though accepting his answer to their unasked question, Chiharu hid back behind her Vogue Magazine and Takashi and Rika back to their conversation.

Lunch hour passed quickly and not having any classes after lunch, both Sakura and Syaoran headed home. Once they left school grounds, some familiar faces ambushed them: Di Camron and his 'gang'.

Sakura pulled closer to Syaoran as they advanced towards them.

"Don't be afraid of them, Sakura. I'm here." Syaoran whispered. Sakura nodded. Camron's group blocked the sidewalk and Syaoran and Sakura stopped.

"Well if it isn't the little slut and her bodyguard." Shot Camron venomously.

"I wouldn't talk Di, I was the one who gave that black eye last time you tried something." Retorted Syaoran. Sakura gripped his arm tighter as Camron walked up to them. He looked down at Sakura.

"I should have known you would have gone for a guy like him." He whispered fiercely. Sakura glared. "He's no match for me in the sack though, sorry kid. You missed out." He went too far. Sakura balled up his fist angrily. Syaoran just glared at him, not really caring what he thought about his 'abilities'. "We would have be great, Sakura. Too bad you panicked." He smirked.

'_That's it. I can't take this anymore. I don't need to hear his crap!' _Sakura's arm twitched as she made her mind. She looked at Camron straight in the eyes.

"I think you're right." She said sweetly. Syaoran looked down at her betrayed. "We would have been great." Camron looked triumphant. He drew closer to her so their noses were almost touching, he smirked.

"Really?" He asked intrigued. Sakura just smiled and nodded.

"Yup." He took her hand in his. Sakura's arm tightened, and her fist connected squarely with his already bruised face. She glared at him as he fell back onto his butt. "Too bad you're a prick and a chauvinistic bastard." With that she looked up at Syaoran, who stared back proudly. "Leave me alone Di. You had your chance and you 'screwed' it up." Her and Syaoran left laughing as Camron stayed on the pavement in disbelief.

Returning home Sakura and Syaoran just sat at watched some television. They talked for a while afterwards too, mostly about how pathetic Camron was. Sakura looked over to Syaoran and smiled genuinely. He returned the favor.

"Thanks for everything, Syaoran." She whispered and kissed him delicately on the lips. "You give me courage to persevere, always." He pulled her face towards his and his lips danced across her face. She pulled him close as he whispered sweet nothings in her ear.

"I love you." He whispered and her spine tingled. "You're my everything."

Sakura pulled from him only to kiss him passionately. She looked into his eyes and kissed him again, teasingly. Playfulness shone in her eyes as she kissed him drawing to _their_ room. Caressing each other they fell on the bed. He ran his hand over her body and she just pulled herself closer in anticipation. After pulling off each other's tops, Syaoran branded Sakura as his own; on her shoulder.

Suddenly, the phone rang and they both look at each other quizzically as though asking if they should stop to answer it. Syaoran pulled back and walked bare chest out of the room to get the phone.

_'Is it just me or does a phone always ring when we're doing something important?' _Sakura thought as she checked out Syaoran's retreating figure.

* * *

**A/N:** Okay! So is everyone happy? Sakura and Syaoran finally got together. Let's hear it for the 'Sex Chapter'. I promise I'll try not to do this every chapter, it's just important to understand how impulsive the characters are,... not that that means anything... Any who...

My friend has been bugging me.. (not really) but was really exciting for the next chapter (this one) so I decided not to put extra crap in it and just put the essentials.

Will Sakura and Syaoran's lives be tranquil now that Camron has been 'defeated'?

Or has Camron really accepted that Sakura didn't choose him?

What lengths is he willing to go to to claim his 'prize'?

Who phoned?

And will the phone ever stop interrupting 'something' important!

**Tune in next time for the next chapter of...**

**INNER STRUGGLES! **

**(No release date scheduled, sry ;)**

Remember:

**More reviews - Happy Kikamo-chan - more inspiration - faster updates - more fun stories ((-))**

Ja ne,

Kikamo-chan ((-))

4 156 words... short chapter.. I know


	9. Assurance and Meetings

**Inner Struggles**

**Summary:**

A lonely teenager tries to move on in life after her family mysteriously disappears. Left only with a shred of courage and one clue to finding her family, she sets out to the only place she can find sanctuary but ends up finding so much more.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura, Clamp does. :sniff:sniff:

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Chapter 9:**

**Assurance and Meetings**

Syaoran came back and leaned against the doorway. He looked at Sakura, eye brows raised. She leaned against the headboard and returned the look. Silence.

"Well aren't you coming back?" She asked. He shook his head. Sakura tilted her head pleadingly. "Why not?" Syaoran smirked at her childishness.

"Sakura... what day is it?" There was a pause then understanding dawned on her as she quickly reached for her shirt and ran out the door. Coming out of her room she was wearing her waitress outfit. Tying her hair up, she reached up and kissed Syaoran on the lips softly. She looked into his eyes.

"Thanks, I had forgotten." She smiled sincerely. "We'll finish... that up when I get back." He leaned down and kissed her.

"I'll hold you to your word." He smirked. He ran his hand down her face and admired her beauty. "Now go, I don't want to you be late." She blew him a kiss as she ran out the door.

At the Café, she realised that it had been ages since she had worked. She went behind the counter focused on getting back into routine. Naoko, her supervisor, walked up to her.

"Hey Sakura, I'm glad I called you. It's been really busy lately. It's hard to find decent people to work now-a-days." She smiled, Sakura smiled back.

"Thanks, that means a lot." Naoko looked at her strangely. "What?" Sakura asked Naoko innocently as she got some coffee for a gentleman in the line.

"Nothing, you just seem different, happier." Sakura blushed. "So am I right?" Sakura nodded. "Is it because of Camron?" Sakura went rigid. "I'm sorry." Naoko said quickly. "You know me, my mouth goes off sometimes. So why are you happy?" Sakura loosened up.

"Well, I'm not with Di anymore; I broke up with him because of issues." She paused. "Do you remember that tall brunette guy who would always comes in to see me?" She smiled as Naoko understood. "Well, about a month ago he said he was interested but I was still seeing Di so I couldn't accept. Well we were the best of friends before anyways so when I broke up with Di he sort of swept me off my feet and it's felt like a fairy tale ever since." She smiled.

"That's great Sakura! I envy you!" Naoko teased. "Best get to work though. They aren't paying us to talk." They both laughed and got to work serving the people.

Soon the hours seemed to fly by and eventually Syaoran came through the door to pick her up. He sat at a table and hid behind a newspaper where Sakura couldn't see him. Finally she came to take his order. He remained behind the paper intent on surprising her. He disguised his voice when he ordered and smiled to himself. She wouldn't expect a thing. Sakura was back in no time with his non-caffeinated tea. She looked at him oddly.

_'What kind of man orders tea and reads a paper at this time of night?' _Shrugging it off she set the tea down and went back to the counter. She went back to her other customers but always kept an eye on the stranger behind the paper. She just had to wait long enough for him to sneak a look around and she would catch him. Catch him she did!

_'Syaoran!' _She smiled to herself as she formulated another sly plan. _'He thinks he can hide from me, well we'll see about that!' _She swiftly walked up to Naoko and told her she was taking her break. Naoko looked at her strangely but when Sakura pointed towards the man with the news paper and whispered it was Syaoran she understood. Silently Sakura glided towards the booth Syaoran was hiding in. She slipped in beside him and grabbed his arm still not looking at his face.

Syaoran seemed startled. Did she know it was him? No she couldn't. Then was she hitting on another man? Wait but he was that man... It didn't make sense. Suddenly he felt her hand rub along the inside of his thigh. He tensed. What was she doing? Pulling himself together he disguised his voice and asked, "Miss," his voice cracked. "What are you doing?" She continued to rub.

"Nothing." She said coyly. "I'm just so attracted to you. You seem like you have such strong arms, your hands seemed so powerful." She giggled inwardly. "A little girl like me is naturally attracted to a man like you." She wrapped her leg around his and ran her foot up and down his leg.

"Shouldn't a girl like you already have someone?" He felt her head shake.

"No, no one special. Just a bed partner, that's all." She smiled and finally looked up. Syaoran looked down at her confused but totally aroused. She unhooked her arm from his and wrapped it around his neck. "My bed partner is no one special." She whispered then looked into his eyes and said truthfully. "He's unique and God-sent. He's more then special, he's extraordinary." She kissed him passionately. He wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her close. Releasing from their passion, Syaoran leaned his forehead against her's.

"Dido." He smirked. She pouted as she realised that he was mocking her. She turned around and pretended to be hurt while she stalked back behind the counter. Syaoran ran his hand through his hair and got up and walked to her. He leaned against the counter. "Sakura, it's late. We both have school tomorrow and you've already worked passed your hours. Come on home." He sat down on a stool as she ignored him. "Sakura..."

"I can't Syaoran, there are people to serve." She said hotly, still feigning anger. Syaoran swivelled on the stool and looked at the diner, it was empty.

"Sakura, the only person here to serve is me." She turned away. He stood up and leaned in closer to her. "And if you ask me, we could 'serve' each other better at home." Sakura noticed his innuendo and it struck a nerve.

_'Is that all he sees me as? An easy lay?' _This thought disturbed her for she had been serious about him being her God-sent. Quickly she turned around and slammed her hands on the counter and caught him off guard.

"Is that all I am to you? You know Li Syaoran; I was being completely honest with you when I said you were the world to me!" Her eyes were stern and fiery. Syaoran recoiled but quickly regained his composure.

"So was I! You really think of me that way?" He asked revolted. Unexpectedly Sakura jumped towards him and kissed him on the nose. She smiled mischievously and untied her apron. Putting it on the counter she yelled to Naoko, who was in the back.

"I'm going now! See you tomorrow Naoko!" She skipped from behind the counter and hooked onto Syaoran's arm. "Let's go!"

"Wait...Aren't you mad?" She shook her head.

"Nope, it was all an act." Sensing her playfulness Syaoran kissed her on the forehead and pulled her towards the door. They hurried out into the parking lot and jumped into the car and went home.

The next morning they woke up just as the sun peeked through the window. Sakura lay against Syaoran and watched the sunrise. A chill ran up her spine. Syaoran tightened his arm around her protectively. She hugged him close and thought to herself.

_'Why does today feel so special, almost foreboding?'_

Syaoran looked down at her serious face. He lifted her chin slightly and looked into her eyes. He bent over and gently kissed her. He looked to the window at the already risen sun. He turned back to her and smiled.

"Morning beautiful, I think it's time to get ready for school." She sat up in Syaoran's over-large T-shirt. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes. He stared at her observantly. He had never really realised how young she was. There had only been a year difference but she was still innocent, a child at heart. Had their relationship been moving too fast, for both of them? He sat up straight and just watched her get ready. He would be 19 soon, and she was still 17.

_'Her birthday _is_ before mine though_.' He tried to convince himself. He ran his hand through his hair. _'What am I worried about? We love each other and this is serious, not a fling_.' He thought about that word for a moment, 'serious'. Somehow he still felt like he was taking advantage of her.

"You're crazy Syaoran." He said to himself. Sakura was already dressed in her uniform. She looked at him strangely.

"Syaoran? What's wrong?" She walked over to him and sat down on the bed. He just shook his head. "Come on, talk to me." She placed her hand on his cheek. He pulled her towards him forcefully. They were so close; Sakura felt his breath on her nose. He kissed her powerfully and she fell back onto the pillow with surprise. She ran her hand across his bare back. As soon as things were getting exciting, they stopped just as suddenly as they began. Syaoran pulled up and looked her straight in the eyes.

"I love you Sakura." He spoke huskily. She blushed as she looked at him. She drew closer to him and was about to kiss him, when he placed a finger over her lips and she fell back into the pillows. "We need to slow down." He said firmly. He dropped her fully into the pillows and got up and went into his closet. She pushed herself onto her elbows and looked at him totally confused.

Syaoran re-entered into the bedroom fully clothed and ready to leave after breakfast. Sakura was still awe-struck. He looked at her pained.

"What was that all about?" She asked as she sat up. He didn't say anything. "Syaoran, don't ignore me." She swung her legs over the edge of the bed and stood up. She straightened her uniform. Syaoran just stood at the door, watching her. She walked up to him. Her eyes became misty. "You say you love me..." She began as her voice cracked. Syaoran looked at her concerned. She looked straight at him. "Are you breaking up with me? Was it how I am... there?" She motioned to the bed. Tears began to spill down her face. "I don't know what's happening Syaoran! You aren't talking to me!" She cried into her hands. Quickly Syaoran swung his arms around her. He soothed her until she was calm. She just stood against his chest listening to his heart beat.

"No, don't worry Sakura. I love you too much to be that stupid." He hugged her tighter. "I just think it's time we got back to us... the relationship. There's so much more here then just sex." He pulled her from his embrace and looked her straight in the eye. "It's not that I'm not attracted to you, I just love you more when we can talk or watch a movie or play games. I love the Kinomoto Sakura I first met the most." She pushed away the remaining tears on her face and smiled.

"Really?" She hugged him close. After they hugged, she kissed him quickly and then ran to the washroom and came out with her hair in two long braids and a brilliant smile on her face. They ate together and then left for school. School didn't seem so dangerous now that Di wasn't there. She felt safe with her friends and especially Syaoran.

Entering first block she sat beside Tomoyo as per usual. So much had happened lately it felt like a long time since she had just hung out with her. They chatted, and by the end of the block had decided that they would get together that night and do something, just the four of them.

The morning sped by and Sakura was eager to see Syaoran. Her and Tomoyo sat at the usual lunch table and started eating. Sakura was chatting with Rika and Tomoyo with Takashi as Chiharu was still hid behind her Vogue magazine. Syaoran came and slid next to Sakura and snaked his arm around her waist. She quickly kissed him on the cheek and went back to her conversation with Rika.

"I totally agree with you Rika, there isn't enough free time between blocks." Sakura said as she leaned her head against Syaoran's shoulder. "Especially with all those little grade 10ers that don't know the hallway system." She laughed.

"The grade 10ers aren't that bad, it's the couples that just stop to have make-out sessions." Rika replied eyeing the two sitting across from her accusingly.

"You only say that because you don't have a boyfriend Rika." She smirked through her blush. "Plus it's normal to show affection." She shot her nose to sky in mock offence. They laughed it off. They talked some more. Syaoran checked his watch and at seeing the time, packed his things together. Noticing this, Sakura looked at him puzzled. He leaned over and kissed her on the forehead before picking up his school things and leaving. Sakura excused herself, Rika fully understood the reason.

As Syaoran neared the doors, Sakura called to him. He turned around and smiled. She ran up to him and stopped out of breath.

"Where are you going?" She asked as she huffed.

"I just have to see my teacher before class starts." He showed her a paper he wrote. "He gave me a horrible mark and I want to know why. Why? Where did you think I was going?" He asked raising a brow.

"I wasn't sure." She answered truthfully. "I wasn't going to let you get away without a proper good-bye though." She pouted. He looked at her and smiled at her childish-ness. She stood there for a while with her hands on her hips. "Well? Don't I get a proper kiss?" She smirked playfully. He chuckled to himself and walked to her.

"Of course." He whispered huskily. With his free arm he grabbed her around the waist and pulled her close. She squeaked with surprise but was silenced with his passion. He kissed her delicately and she pushed for more. His hand slid up her back to her neck and he held her face. She threw he arms around his neck and played with his hair.

Soon, they seemed to attract attention and people began to cheer. This brought them back to reality and they pulled apart. Sakura was embarrassed but Syaoran seemed to almost not even realise the crowd.

"Was that a sufficient good-bye?" He whispered into her ear. She giggled and nodded. He was about to leave when she grabbed his hand.

"Don't plan anything tonight, okay? I promised Tomoyo we'd do something with her and Eriol." She smiled when he nodded. "See you soon." She called once he was about entered the school.

Sakura walked back to the lunch table and sat down. All eyes were on her.

"You think that was steamy?" She guessed from the looks on their faces. They nodded. She blushed. "That was one of our tamer kisses." She said quietly to herself.

"Don't brag Sakura." Tomoyo said, "It's making Rika and Chiharu feel bad." The two of them laughed which earned them glares from Takashi. They finished lunch quickly. The bell rang and they headed to class.

After lunch the final block of the day zoomed by; at least for Tomoyo. Sakura kept constantly spacing out and missing some important math concept like combinations and permutations. So much had happened the last little while and Sakura couldn't get over it. She wanted everything to desperately slow down but to the contrary, everything sped up. She was called to stay after class and the teacher assigned her with extra homework due to her "spacing out". So with her pile of homework she got to her locker and shoved it quickly into her backpack. Closing her locker she saw Tomoyo and Syaoran ready to go. She lugged it over to them and sigh exasperated when they started to head to the car. They all dropped their bags in the trunk and Sakura climbed into the front seat by Syaoran. She rested her head on the headrest and gave another huge sigh. Syaoran looked over at her puzzled. Noticing his expression Sakura answered his unvoiced question.

"Sensei gave me extra homework because I wasn't paying attention in class. I have soooo much homework it's not funny." Tomoyo laughed from the back seat.

"Sakura, you only got some notes to copy and two problems extra. It's not that bad." Syaoran seemed to agree but before she could prove her point of tiredness they had arrived at Tomoyo and Eriol's. Tomoyo grabbed her bag from the trunk and they headed to the front door. She pulled it opened and out popped Eriol completely stressed.

"TOMOYO!" He hollered with relief as he flung himself on her. "I thought you where kidnapped or murdered or something!" He failed to notice Sakura and Syaoran standing with her.

"It's okay Eriol." She patted him gently on the back. "I just stayed for a couple of minutes so I could get a ride with Sakura and Syaoran." Suddenly he regained his composure and looked at Syaoran stiffly. Syaoran just shook his head as he followed Tomoyo and Sakura inside. As they passed they all shared 'hellos' and 'good afternoons'.

Eriol and Syaoran headed into the living room as Tomoyo and Sakura headed upstairs to get changed out of their uniforms. As they entered Tomoyo's room, they headed towards her closet and picked out an outfit. Obviously Tomoyo had a secret stash of 'Sakura clothes' just for an 'emergency' like this. She handed Sakura a pair of faded blue jeans with cherry blossoms stitched on the hips and on the back pockets. Then she tossed her a crimson tank top and a white blouse with short sleeves to tie over it. For herself she grabbed a pair of dark blue jeans and a light purple collared shirt. They dressed quickly and hurried down the stairs, almost without a word.

The 'men' where still sitting and talking when they arrived. The girls sat by them and the conversation stopped.

"Well, don't let us stop you from talking." Tomoyo said as she sat next to Eriol.

"No it's fine. We were done anyways." Eriol smiled down at her. Sakura leaned against Syaoran's shoulder and slithered her hand in his. "So, how are things with you two?" He asked raising an eye brow.

"Perfect." Sakura smiled. Syaoran seemed to agree though he kept quite. Silence.

"So do you still work at the cafe?" He asked again trying to create conversation.

"Yup." She nodded. "They only call me when they need extra help though. They know I have school and not a whole lot of time. How's the company going?"

"Good good. We just made a deal with the mall downtown to open another shop. It's going really well. Pretty soon we'll have to start a catalogue." He looked at an overjoyed Tomoyo.

"And you know who I thought the perfect model would be? You; Sakura!" She declared. "I could make a whole new collection and you would be the star! We'd pay you of course because it would take a while. - Mind you it'll take a while to get the clothes manufactured and then the find a photographer. Oh! Then I'd need to color coordinate the whole thing!-"

Tomoyo was gone, lost in her own world. Sakura sadly regretted asking the simple question. Still it did remove the awkward silence. It felt weird to be at a loss of words around them. She was so used to being with Syaoran, and lately words hadn't seemed that important. Syaoran squeezed her hand feeling her uneasiness.

"So there's a school dance coming soon for the graduation. Have you decided whether you're going or not?" Eriol asked Syaoran. He shrugged.

"I hadn't thought about it." Suddenly Sakura sat up straight and looked him in the eye. She was astonished.

"You have to even think about going to your own graduation dance?" He took that as an obvious hint that she wanted to go. He smirked.

"Don't panic, we'll go if you want." He squeezed her hand comfortingly. She looked at him sceptically. "I'm serious. We'll do the whole enchilada; the limo, the tux and everything. I promise." He kissed her delicately on the cheek. "I know you think something is important when you give me that look." She started to blush and hit him playfully on the shoulder.

"Don't mock me. You'll regret saying 'yes' if you don't really want to go. I'll get Tomoyo to design everything." At that Tomoyo was brought into the conversation.

"Oh my goodness! I'd love to do that! Obviously Syaoran would be in plain black, though a satin collar on the jacket would be beautiful against his skin! But my goodness! I'll have to start to design your dress immediately Sakura! Hmmm, maybe a green dress to match your eyes or should I go with your trade mark pink? I don't know! Too many decisions! Oh! And on top of the colour I need to decide the style! Syaoran! What kind of dress do you want your lovely lady to be in?"

Meanwhile, they had all started to exit the room from fear of Tomoyo's tactics. They had all headed into the kitchen and sat at the counter. Eriol had started to make appetizers for before dinner. Tomoyo came zooming in, totally ballistic.

"You can't just drop a bomb like this on me and then run off and start cooking!" She reasoned, rather unreasonably. "Syaoran! Answer the question! What kind of dress? Short, long, poofy, slimming, fattening?-" Syaoran stopped her mouth with his hand. He looked deep into her eyes and spoke clearly.

"Something that comes off easily." He smiled coyly and sat down. "If that's too hard, I trust your judgement." He turned to Sakura and patted the top of her head, her face completely stunned. She started to blush when she realised he was serious. Tomoyo just smiled I pranced over to Eriol.

"Are you sure I can have free artistic domain on this?" She asked cautiously. Finally bursting Sakura and Syaoran both answered at once.

"YES!"

"Okay." She smiled. "But if you end up not liking it, you can't say I didn't ask."

As if on queue, the buzzer beeped and Eriol's hor d'oevres were ready. He put them on the counter and they all started to nibble on the tasty food.

"So what's for dinner?" Syaoran asked once all the appetizers were gone.

"I was thinking we could go out to like some little restaurant or something. Nothing fancy but nice." Eriol said as he took the plate and put it in the dish washer. "I actually know a little place downtown, it's owned by a relative of one of my colleagues."

"Shall we go then?" Syaoran asked as he stood up. Everyone seemed to be in accordance. Just as they were going out the door, Sakura's purse rang. Quickly she reached inside her bag and pulled out her cell phone. Her called ID was clearly labelled, "Naoko". Sighing she picked it up. Nodding with a few, "Yup"s she quickly hung up her cell and put it back into her purse.

She looked at her friends and they all seemed to understand. She and Syaoran drove back to the apartment and she changed into her waitressing outfit. Syaoran was standing near the door, ready to drive her. Putting on her shoes she looked at him. As they were leaving she stopped him.

"Actually you know what Syaoran, you don't have to drive me. It's only a short walk and I could use the fresh air." She smiled.

"Are you sure?" He asked raising an eyebrow. She nodded. "I'll be okay, I promise." She kissed him on the cheek. "Thanks anyways." She jogged down the stairs of the building. "Love you!" She called back and blew him a kiss. He smiled as she walked away. He watched her as she headed in between the buildings.

Sakura headed through the alley and suddenly felt a chill run up her back. She stopped and hugged her coat around herself tightly. She glanced around but saw no one. She started walking again, swifter. From behind her she heard a loud clang and she turned around startled. There stood a tall man, covered in dirt and worn close. She started to shake. He took a step towards her.

"Sakura?" He said gruffly. She stepped away. He reached towards her. She cowered and screamed for help.

"HELP! SYAORAN!"

As though it was destined that he stay a moment longer after watching her leave, Syaoran heard her scream from the front door of their apartment. He jolted up and ran towards her panicking voice. He knew that he had to protect her and make sure she was safe.

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**A/N:** Haha! See I did update…. Okay so I updated like a year later…. So what?

Teehee! The climax is almost here! That's exciting :)

Will Syaoran get to Sakura in time to help her?

Who is that man in the alley?

How does he know Sakura?

How will this affect Sakura and Syaoran's relationship?

**Tune in for the next chapter of…**

**INNER STRUGGLES!**

**(no release date scheduled, sry ;)**

Remember :

**More reviews – Happy Kikamo-chan – more inspiration – faster updates – more fun stories ((-))**


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